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Yes, yes. It's a Ricktatorship.


Remember how exciting it was that Democrats in the Virginia House of Delegates (they can't just have "representatives" because the state constitution says everything has to be Ye Olde Quainte and Olde-Timeye) had, in a single election, erased a Republican majority when a recount last month gave the Democrat, Shelly Simonds, the win by ONE VOTE, and we were all excited, because HOLY SHIT? Unfortunately, after that recount, and because the Democrat Simonds had won, the Republicans challenged to have this one contested ballot included, and the three Republican election judges said, sure, looks like that there's a vote for Republican David Yancey, the incumbent. Seriously, this goddamned mess of what any sane election system would toss as a spoiled ballot gave Yancey one more vote, and a tie:

The fuck is that thing? The election judges gave the ballot to Yancey after deciding the line drawn through the bubble for Simonds indicated the voter had changed their mind -- but a similar "X" through the single vote for Ralph Northam seems to indicate the voter might just have well started by mis-marking the ballot for Yancey. We say it's broccoli, and we say the hell with it. And so does Virginia state law, not that anyone was paying attention.

For more on what a complete farce the recount challenge was, see this excellent overview by Carolyn Fiddler. Just one example of how Team Yancey disregarded the law in order to get that one fucked-up vote included:

Oh, and there's plenty more: One of the three election judges had been recommended for the job by Yancey himself, three years ago, but didn't recuse himself. Fiddler details other deviations from proper recount procedure that should have led to Yancey's challenge being overturned. But hey, the Republican-appointed election judges had a Republican seat to save. And the first fallback, the gerrymandering that meant a 10-point advantage in total votes statewide barely resulted in a freaking TIE, had already failed to sufficiently disenfranchise Democrats. Clearly, Virginia needs a voter fraud commission.

Simonds sued to overturn Yancey's challenge, but a three-Republican-judge panel said no, ma'am, that's a perfectly cromulent vote for Yancey, and today a random drawing was held, giving the win to Yancey.

Hey, in case it makes you any less outraged, Simonds and Yancey's names were placed in identical film cannisters inside "a special bowl crafted by the resident potter at the Virginia Museum of Fine Arts." Whose budget the one-vote Republican minority in the House of Delegates will probably cut.

We can still feel great about Democrats having taken 15 seats away from Republicans in Virginia's lower house, but that ballot stinks -- and let's hope it fires up Virginia Dems enough to keep them good and mad until the 2019 state elections. Ralph Northam will be inaugurated as governor on January 13, and that single R vote may mean the goal of expanding Medicaid in the state for 400,000 Virginians may fall just short, unless a couple of Republicans in the lower house can be persuaded to vote for it.

Republicans maintain a 21-19 majority in the state legislature's upper house (Virginians charmingly call it the "Senate"), so even if Simonds had won the Delegate seat and forced power-sharing, passage of Medicaid expansion wasn't guaranteed. The Senate had at least agreed in its last term to a modified Medicaid expansion that would have used public funds to buy poor people private insurance, so there's still some prospect of a deal for full expansion of plain old Medicaid Medicaid. With any luck, Virginia Rs will listen to the polling, which shows widespread public support for Medicaid expansion -- except among Republicans, of course.

A few Virginia Rs might even take the risk of supporting Medicaid expansion in hopes of not being defeated by a Democrat in 2019, eh? Could that happen? We like to think nice thoughts.

Then again, in an indication of Republican respect for fair play for all, The Hill notes that while Virginia law allows the loser of a tie-election draw to request one more recount, Ms. Simonds said in advance that she "would not request a second recount if she lost the drawing. Yancey declined to make the same pledge."

Imagine that.

Yr Wonkette is supported by reader donations. Please click here to send us money, which we are happy to say can't be gerrymandered.

[The Hill / WaPo / Vox]

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

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Robbin Young. Fair use so we can all see the boob picture she sent to her 12 true loves.

Robbin Young starred in the Roger Moore masterpiece For Your Eyes Only as the seventh female lead, "Girl in Flower Shop." She also starred in a bunch of Playboys, and the DM's of a humble Romanian hacker who stole her heart. But he was not a humble Romanian hacker, he was 12 Russian military intelligence officers in a trench coat. And now Young has shared those DMs and pictures of her buzzies with the Sun, because that's the one that's fookin' classy.

See how she loved! See how Guccifer ghosted her ass! See how she loves him (them) still! See how she was all up in Seth Rich and shit! (We think Young's judgment might not be awesome.) Also she wrote this "erotic poem," and we're going to need you to read it.

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And now it is time for your weekly reminder that in the Trump era, FUCKING APESHIT OUTRAGE WORKS.

On Monday, Donald Trump, the transactional president who for some godforsaken reason sees Vladimir Putin has his one true father, discussed making an Art Of The Deal with Russia that involved letting Robert Mueller interrogate the Russian spies who hacked America in 2016 (with Russian supervision, of course, in Russia) in exchange for sending Putin whichever American citizens hurt Putin's poor fragile butthurt pansy-ass feelings the past several years. One of Putin's targets is Michael McFaul, the former ambassador to Russia, whom Putin just hates. Hillary Clinton isn't on the official list yet, but give it a few weeks.

On Wednesday, Sarah Huckabee Sanders looked at reporters and told them Trump's people were considering the idea, but hadn't decided yet, because it's so hard for the Trump administration to decide how many treasons to do per week.

But hooray! The White House has decided that, after literally every American with a patriotic bone in his or her body said, "THE FUCK YOU SAY," they will not send Americans to Putin's gulag after all. The Washington Post reports:

The White House announced Trump's opposition Thursday as the Senate prepared to vote on a resolution telling the president not to honor Putin's request, which would have exposed former U.S. ambassador Michael McFaul, among others, to Russian questioning.

"It is a proposal that was made in sincerity by President Putin, but President Trump disagrees with it," White House press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders said in a statement.

Oh my fucking Lord, Shuckabee, did you really type that Putin's offer was "sincere," or did Donald grab the statement after you finished with it and add those words in illiterate Sharpie in the margins, along with "DOES NOT MEAN PUTIN IS NOT MY BEST FRIEND" and "NO COLLUSION"?

By the way, that resolution passed the Senate with flying colors:

WOMP WOMP, Trump! Sorry American freedom and democracy stepped all over your dick again! Guarantee it's gonna happen again! Go fuck yourself! Enjoy the 48 Big Macs you have for dinner tonight! Don't talk directly into the soccer ball Putin gave you, 'less you want it to talk back to you in Russian!

OK post over.

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[Washington Post]

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