Republicans Scream 'RIGGED!' In California Recall, Nation Yawns
Photo: Gage Skidmore, Creative Commons License 2.0

The Fuck Your Feelings crowd sure does have an active fantasy life. The gormless goon squad has convinced itself that the only way it can lose tomorrow's gubernatorial recall election in California is if Democrats cheat. Just three years after Gavin Newsom was elected with a 23-point margin over his Republican opponent, less than a year after Joe Biden beat Donald Trump by 29 points in the state, those math whizzes are sure Democrats need fraudulent votes to hold on to the governor's mansion in one of the bluest states in the union.

Team Wishcast is currently banging the drum about supposed fraudulent ballots, flogging every bit of anecdata it can find to cover up the reality that its brand is toxic with suburban woman and its candidate is a nasty loon.

"We're going to sic our lawyers on them, file lawsuits right away," Larry Elder promised supporters last week, shrugging off the failure of Trump's gazillion election suits as mere procedural blips.

"They're gonna cheat, we know that," he continued, directing his fans to be ever-vigilant and record their suspicions at, the better to compile a Kraken-style dossier of arglebargle affidavits to be dropped on various courts accompanied by a demand to toss out millions of votes in the name of freedom. Third verse, same as the first.

Here's Ric Grenell, the Twitter troll Trump parked at the Directorate of National Intelligence, promising to beat back vote fraud with a big scary ad. Take that, libs!

Fingers crossed they can bring back Mellissa Carone for an encore — America could really use the laugh.

California has signature matching and unique bar codes for every ballot mailed out. Nonetheless, Republicans have seized on various ballot accommodations for disabled voters as science proof that the vote is HASHTAG RIGGED. As Media Matters points out, the wingnuttosphere is currently fixated on the ability of a small number of visually impaired voters to print their own ballots.

"How does California decide what's a disability?" wondered OAN host Natalie Harp in an interview with Elder last month. But Harp's just asking questions ploy was a pillar of journalistic integrity compared to Newsmax, which allowed Trump to complain that "you can even make your own ballot," implying that Democrats were just printing out votes by the thousand on their HP Office Jets.

The Gippers also have their bigoted knickers in a twist over a single county's ballot design, which includes a hole in the envelope designed to help visually impaired voters sign in the correct location. Or, as the fart sniffers put it, a hole designed to let devious Democrats 86 Republican votes.

And the nation's foremost golf troll weighed in, in his signature style.

"Does anybody really believe the California Recall Election isn't rigged?" Trump blarped to his followers. "Millions and Millions of Mail-In Ballots will make this just another giant Election Scam, no different, but less blatant, than the 2020 Presidential Election Scam!"

Perhaps mindful that Republican screeching about the fix being in worked to depress turnout in Georgia and hand the Senate over to Democrats, Elder sought to assure his supporters that their cause is not lost.

CNN quotes him predicting victory despite the odds because "What I believe is that no matter what they do -- and I believe that there might very well be shenanigans, as it were in the 2020 election -- no matter what they do, so many Californians are angry about what's going on."

Whatever you need to tell yourself, buddy.

Meanwhile, if California women (other than Rose McGowan) were under the impression that Republicans were maybe not so bad, the Supreme Court's abortion bombshell put an end to that one. The latest polling shows Newsom ahead by double digits overall, with 66 percent of women preferring Newsom to Elder according to the Public Policy Institute of California.

Over at the Post, the goalposts have shifted for conservatives. In an opinion piece titled "Whether Newsom wins or not, his political instability is on full display," Hoover Institution fellow Bill Whalen assures us that a double digit win is actually a resounding loss for Newsom and progressives because "the ignominy of needing to fight to keep a job he won in a landslide three years ago won't go away."

We love you, California. Don't fuck it up.


[Media Matters / CNN / WaPo]

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Liz Dye

Liz Dye lives in Baltimore with her wonderful husband and a houseful of teenagers. When she isn't being mad about a thing on the internet, she's hiding in plain sight in the carpool line. She's the one wearing yoga pants glaring at her phone.


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