RIP General H.R. McMaster's Credibility! You Will Be Missed!
The latest guy to end up looking like A Idiot because of Donald Trump
Our latest national security adviser, General H.R. McMaster, a guy we are told has impeccable national security credentials (and who is an actual expert at standing up to shitty loser presidents), gave the daily White House press briefing Tuesday, so he could tell everyone about Donald Trump's exciting upcoming trip to Foreign Places. When he was done, reporters were like, "Oh cool, hope Trump has fun on the airplane, but how's about we talk about how he opened up the book of United States Secrets and did show-and-tell for the Russians?"
Monday night, McMaster said the Washington Post story about Trump's leaks was totally wrong, and then proceeded to deny things the WaPo didn't even accuse Trump of. In Tuesday's briefing, McMaster repeated his non-denial, and then gave his best shot at being simultaneously "aw shucks!" and also "everything's fine!" What really came across, though, is that Trump is an unhinged CrazyPants McBadStain who has no business knowing our state secrets in the first place. The other thing that came across was that the WaPo story was spot-on.
Our favorite part came at the end, when McMaster dropped the bomb that Trump didn't even know the source of the information he spilled to the Russians, so how could he have even known he was telling secrets? For real:
— Kyle Griffin (@kylegriffin1) May 16, 2017
MCMASTER: I should just make maybe the statement here that the president wasn’t even aware where this information came from. He wasn’t briefed on the source or method of the information either.
See? NO BIG DEAL! Just a U.S. president sharing information he doesn't understand with two of his closest Russian buddies! The intelligence community doesn't tell Trump things anyway, and he's too ADD to sit through a whole intelligence briefing anyway, so why are you even worried?
What IS a big deal, according to McMaster, who was repeating Trump's fever dream talking points like a good little soldier, is LEAKS LEAKS IT IS THE ILLEGAL LEAKS! McMaster wasn't talking about Trump leaking to the Russians, though, but rather the mean people who whispered to the Washington Post about Trump's Russian cuddle session.
From NBC's Ken Dilanian:
McMaster also told the reporters over and over again that while he still can't deny that Trump rubbed highly classifed information all over the Russians' exposed bellies, it was "wholly appropriate," because Trump is the decider, therefore it is BY DEFINTION "wholly appropriate":
Q: Are you denying that he revealed information?
— Kyle Griffin (@kylegriffin1) May 16, 2017
MCMASTER: What we don't do is discuss what is and what isn't classified. What I will tell you is in the context of that discussion, what the president discussed with the foreign minister [and the Russian ambassador! - Ed.] was wholly appropriate to that conversation, and is consistent with the routine sharing of information between the president and any leaders with whom he's engaged.
And when Trump was talking to the Russians, did he name the city where the intelligence was sourced from? McMaster does not deny that!
And did this information come from an ally (Israel. It was Israel), which would mean we definitely SHOULD NOT share it with a non-ally like Russia? (Silly question, because dumb dildo Donald Trump thinks Russia IS our ally!) Here was McMaster's reply:
MCMASTER: I'm not going to be the one to confirm that, because that's sort of information that could jeopardize our security.
Oh now we're worried about that?
And is McMaster concerned that our allies will stop sharing sexxxy information with us, because Trump prematurely ejaculates whatever he hears to any Russians who might be listening?
MCMASTER. No, I'm not concerned at all.
Huh. A German lawmaker and another senior European intelligence official already have said they might stop sharing intelligence with the U.S., but maybe McMaster just hasn't gotten that memo yet.
If McMaster truly isn't worried, it's probably because our allies have been withholding intelligence from Trump for months (which we have noted THREE TIMES TODAY), because the president is an untrustworthy and bad man.
In related news, wingnut Erick Erickson took time out of his busy goat-fucking schedule (we kid!) to write a blog post about how what happened in the Oval Office with Trump and the Russians was even worse than what's been reported, and Erickson says he knows this because one of the WaPo's sources is a pal of his. WHOA IF TRUE!
It's probably not true, though, because H.R. McMaster just said it's no big deal, and he is a man of IMPECCABLE CREDIBILITY, so why would he lie? Just kidding, McMaster is part of the Trump White House now, which means we will assume he is always lying from here on out, and if McMaster doesn't like that, maybe he shouldn't have accepted the job.
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