'Andrea Tantaros bikini'

You know how we at Wonkette are superduper hilarious and also quite funny? Shut up yes we are. WELL! One of our longtime jokes in the chatcave is wondering who comes to the site every so often searching for "Andrea Tantaros bikini." Oh, we have such fun, chortling and guffawing. "Andrea Tantaros is googling herself again," we say, because we are catty bitches. It must be Andrea Tantaros! Who else could it possibly be???

According to [Andrea] Tantaros’s account, [Fox News chief Roger] Ailes began harassing her on August 12, 2014. During a meeting in Ailes’s office, Ailes allegedly asked Tantaros to do “the twirl” so he could see her figure. She refused. Then, in mid-December of that year, Ailes made another advance, Burstein says. “Ailes asked her to turn around, and then he said, ‘Come over here so I can give you a hug.’” Tantaros rebuffed the advance, Burstein says.

In February 2015, Tantaros was pulled off the 5 p.m. program The Five and demoted to working full-time on the midday show Outnumbered. In February 2015, according to Burstein, Ailes allegedly harassed Tantaros again in his office, asking about her workout routine because her body “looked good” and mentioning that she must “really look good in a bikini.”

OH MY FUCKING GOD, IT WAS ROGER AILES ALL ALONG. (In the study, with his hamburger meatballs.)

New York Mag's Gabriel Sherman reveals much more than just Tantaros's bikini, of course, as he has been doing for years (but particularly in the month-ish since Gretchen Carlson sued the bejesus out of Roger Ailes for canning her for not showing him her cans).

For instance! We did not notice Tantaros had been taken off the air back in April, because why would we notice that, but apparently she was! And she says it's because she refused the objectively disgusting lecher's advances! (Also, she went to HR. Repeatedly. For over a year. And HR was decidedly less than helpful!)

Yesterday we were also treated to this fascinating story by a high-up Fox producer, who thought she and her lawyers had cured Ailes of his piggery once and for all.

Following Sherman, Buzzfeed comes in with the assist, with the extra news that Tantaros also complained about other jackasses:

The four-page letter was made available to be reviewed by BuzzFeed News and read in its entirety on the condition that it not be published. In the March 16 letter, Tantaros, through her lawyer, accused by name four Fox News male personalities — two on-air contributors, a correspondent, and a host — of inappropriate behavior.

We're gonna go with Doocy, Ablow, Todd Starnes, and Ed Henry, but we're not sure about Ed Henry. (Is Peter Doocy a "correspondent"? If he is, it's totally Peter Doocy.) The rest of those dudes? Did it for sure, ALLEGEDLY! (Alleged by us, guessing, here.)

Anyway, we are sorry those gross pigs grossed all over you, Andrea Tantaros. Even though you're the worst, you still get to have feminism.

[NYMag / DailyBeast / Buzzfeed]

Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.

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Oh hi! Michael Cohen is going to jail, because he is guilty! Just like Paul Manafort is guilty and GO THE FUCK TO JAIL! WHERE HE ALREADY WAS! (Read up on that here!) And all this news came out in the same hour, somehow, because we live in the dumbest fucking episode of "Law & Order" Dick Wolf ever threw on the cutting room floor, on account of how it was too stupid for words.

However, Cohen avoided a big nasty trial (or series of trials, like Manafort opted for) by just cold pleading guilty to a buncha fuckin' crimes, like a crimer who does a buncha fuckin' crimes all the time. And he implicated Donald Trump in a couple of them!

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HOLY FUCK this afternoon! Michael Cohen just finished a hearing in a New York courtroom where he said, "DURRRR I AM SO GUILTY," but this post is not about that. This post is about how Paul Manafort verdict has just come out! He has been found guilty on eight of the 18 charges he faced in the Eastern District of Virginia (EDVA). The jury is hopelessly deadlocked on the other 10, and so a mistrial will be declared on those and Paul Manafort may get to be retried on them, in addition to his next trial over conspiracies against the United States and witness tampering, which starts next month in Washington DC. Maybe the government will decide Manafort is going to die in jail anyway, and play hooky from retrying those other counts. They probably need a vacay, don't you think?

Trump really does hire the best people!

NBC News's Ken Dilanian broke the news that Manafort has been convicted on five counts of tax fraud, one count of failing to report a foreign bank account on an IRS form, and two charges of bank fraud. The short version of that is that he is guilty of EIGHT FEDERAL FELONIES (so far) and he is going to jail for EIGHT MILLION YEARS for each count. (OK, that is probably not completely accurate. But still, welcome to prison, Paul Manafort!)

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