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Romney Wins Super Bowl of Nevada GOP 2012 Politics, Again

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Actual Mitt sign in mostly foreclosed Las Vegas suburb, 2008.There was another caucus, apparently! The reason nobody noticed is because it was in Nevada, which is actually home to lots of Republican-voting Mormons. (Take out the corporate prostitution resort of Las Vegas in the southern corner of the state, and Nevada is just a sparsely populated length of mountains and desert right next to Utah.) But Romney is programmed to treat all wins the same, no matter how expected and no matter how few delegates are at stake, so the beaming Mittens will be transported out of Nevada by personal corporate jet with at least 10 delegates but certainly nothing like the 50 he picked up in Florida. The only pressing question is whether a cheap Huffington Post gimmick like putting "Super Bowl" in the headline will increase the page views for this post.


The picture you see above is a real "Mitt Romney campaign sign" photograph, from a Nevada stucco ghetto in 2008! It was the only political sign your editor saw after miles and miles of driving slowly through the decimated housing tracts, many already abandoned by their underwater mortgage holders early in 2008. (Las Vegas and Clark County lean heavily to the Democratic side, which also holds a 50,000-voter registration lead statewide.)

There was no Democratic contest this time around, so we were spared the dumb chaos of another "Casino Caucus." So, there was no real contest at all. Mitt Romney, because he worships a space alien also worshiped by many people in the neighboring state of Utah, easily won Nevada's GOP caucus. These are the important issues that will decide everything, maybe, until the real space aliens arrive, later this year.

Now that there's no "plausible" way for the Newt or anyone but Romney to win the GOP nomination, Gingrich is (of course) predicting he will seal it up by Texas, when Mittens will withdraw in a rare display of personal shame. [Washington Post]

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Lace up your sneakers, Wonkers! Time to hit the streets. MoveOn, the ACLU, MomsRising and all your favorite dirty leftists are getting together for a yuuuuuuuuge march to show that WE ARE A NATION OF DECENT FUCKING HUMAN BEINGS WHO DON'T KIDNAP BABIES. And your Wonkette will be there!

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Rudy Giuliani, flapping his loose yap to Politico on Monday:

President Donald Trump's attorney Rudy Giuliani said on Monday that he was actually just bluffing last week when he called for Justice Department leaders to suspend special counsel Robert Mueller's investigation within 24 hours.

"I didn't think it would," Giuliani told POLITICO with a laugh when asked about the Mueller inquiry's still being very much an active investigation. "But I still think it should be." [...]

That's what I'm supposed to do," Giuliani explained on Monday. "What am I supposed to say? That they should investigate him forever? Sorry, I'm not a sucker."

Cool, that is just Rudy Giuliani admitting he's full of shit and words and more shit and more words (and also a noun, a verb and 9/11). We are guessing therefore that Giuliani, who is a lawyer, would legally advise us to continue assuming we should take his every oral ejaculation with a gi-normous grain of FULL OF SHIT.

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