Scummy Push Pollsters PINKY-SWEAR Republican Goon Squad Will Win Florida

Republicans are KILLIN' IT in Florida, you guys! No worries about election day, Gators. It's all smooooooth sailing for the Sunshine State GOP. Just take it from Governor Rick Scott's lead pollster Wes Anderson, who produced a whimsical, unskewed poll for the campaign, featuring nostalgic jams about high Republican turnout in those good old days, telling the Tampa Bay Times,
As the linked slides indicate, Governor Scott currently leads Senator Nelson 51% to 46%, a lead that is outside of the margin of error.
It should also be noted that this sample from last week is very robust at 2,200 interviews of likely voters, stratified by county to reflect historic mid-term turnout. Our sample shows the Republicans with a one-point turnout advantage, even though we believe we will end up with a two- or three-point advantage. For historical context, in the past two mid-term elections Republicans had a four-point advantage in 2010 and a three-point advantage in 2014. At R+1, that makes our current sample a very conservative take on the likely partisan composition of this year's electorate.
NEEDZ MOAR BILL MURRAY.
No other pollster has replicated those numbers, with SurveyUSA, Quinnipiac, and CNN/SSRS all finding Bill Nelson in the lead, but if OnMessage, Inc. says Scott is running way ahead, then it must be true! Only OnMessage promises to "take your principles, your experience, and your opponent's weaknesses to develop a winning message plan that the voters will embrace." And who wouldn't trust a push pollster, right?
OnMessage even threw in a couple of questions for walking Sudafed ad Ron DeSantis.
Guess they were won over by that genius spot where DeSantis exhorts his toddler to "Build the Wall" to keep out the brown babies.
Literally no one else has found DeSantis up in six weeks, but according to OnMessage, he's headed for certain victory in the gubernatorial election! Which is probably why DeSantis just canceled his scheduled interview with the six USA Today newspapers in Florida -- too busy popping those champagne corks after that ... uh ... unbelievable performance in the debate against Andrew Gillum on Saturday.
The Tallahassee Democrat reports that a few hours after the debate debacle, DeSantis noped out of a planned roundtable scheduled to be broadcast on Facebook Live.
Ron DeSantis will not sit down today with the editorial boards of the Tallahassee Democrat and USA TODAY NETWORK - Florida.
A spokesman for the campaign informed the Democrat this morning DeSantis would not be attending the hour-long meeting in Tallahassee.
The campaign said a statement would be forthcoming, but by late afternoon nothing was sent.
Probably he's just down with a bad cold. (Seriously, though, someone give that horrible man a handkerchief!)
Blowing off the local media is a baller move. Like taking contributions from known racists. And accusing your African American opponent of "monkeying up." But clearly Trump knew what he was doing when he endorsed DeSantis at the last minute and swung the primary against Florida's Agriculture Commissioner and noted sane person Adam Putnam. So, thanks, Mr. President! We're sure Andrew Gillum sincerely appreciates all you've done for him. Maybe someone will ask him when he sits down with those USA Today Editors on October 31!
ROLL ON RED TI---- .... Errr, never mind.
[Tampa Bay Times / OnMessage Poll / Tallahassee Democrat]
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Liz Dye lives in Baltimore with her wonderful husband and a houseful of teenagers. When she isn't being mad about a thing on the internet, she's hiding in plain sight in the carpool line. She's the one wearing yoga pants glaring at her phone.