NewsJuly 31, 2010 12:46 AM
Remembering Our Fallen Week: ♫Root, Toot, Poot♫
- According to 2010 "constitutional law," impeaching ol'Bama is pretty darn tricky. Luckily, some brave Georgian-era nobility have come forth to impeach Obama in the year 1810.
- Patrick Henry rematerialized in our time to audition for a starring role in Ocean’s 14.
- Barack took precious time away from inventorying Michelle’s secret fur freezer to appear on Barbara Walters' personal brothel and news program, The View.
- Our beloved psychic Octopus will be whisked away to Hogwarts to protect it from Iran’s nuclear missile program.
- This post-dubstep, chillwave-influenced slice of caribou twee-pop glimmers with shoegaze textures lovingly purloined from lead singer Ray Stevens' careful study of Animal Collective's more dissonant moments. 8.7/10
- Virgin-grandma-whore Sarah Palin’s new book cover features an image of the Lady of Grizzlington violently stabbing herself in the chest so she may return to the resurrection ship for a fresh set of breasts.
- It turns out that the defense budget isn't meant for hookers and blow (ALLEGEDLY).