Look! It's SCIENCE!

We can certainly understand the impulse to want to go with anything that might make the Washington Post's very well-sourced allegations against her husband go away. Now, in the attempt to discredit Roy Moore's fifth accuser, Kayla Moore is now just posting any crap the wingnuttophere tosses onto the interwebs, like a dubious "forensic expert" post from the Stupidest Man On the Internet and some random Facebook guy's contention that the restaurant where Mr. Moore allegedly tried to rape Beverly Young Nelson just plain never existed in 1977.

Oh, and never mind that the two conspiracy theories cancel each other out. We'll get to that in a moment, but let's also mention that Ms. Moore says Team Moore is "gathering evidence" that all the accusers have been paid (possibly by George Soros):

As of the moment, the only "evidence" of such a thing was that stupid Gateway Pundit story reprinting baseless claims from a Twitter account that has now been deleted. But maybe they have some really shocking evidence that doesn't come from a nutty rightwing website? Many things are possible!

Ms. Moore has also linked to that Breitbart story proving that in 1979, there were no phone cords long enough to allow a teen girl to take a home phone into her own room:

Her latest posts are just sort of sad, really. One links to a Facebook story by some rando in OHIO, claiming that the Very Idea that Beverly Wilson worked at the "Old Hickory House" in Gadsden, Alabama, is IMPOSSIBLE, because obviously Gloria Allred stole the name of another restaurant in Georgia:

We can't say we agree 100% with Mr. Baker's police work, there. He claims a search on some online business directory shows the Gadsden Old Hickory House has only been in business since 2001. Ergo, it just plain didn't exist in 1977, and Gloria Allred made up the whole story by stealing the name of some place in Georgia that DID have a 40th anniversary. There's a small problem with the logic there:

But let's say that picture is a liar. If that restaurant had never existed in 1977, or if Ms. Wilson had never been a waitress, we're pretty sure the Alabama press would be full of stories debunking Wilson. Instead, AL.com brings us a story about other people in Gadsden who remember Moore being fishy at the mall, and another waitress at a different restaurant who remembers Moore being kind of creepy, albeit in the '90s:

Another former waitress, Victoria Beverstock, told AL.com today that she was 20 years old and working at The Poor House restaurant in 1992 when Moore came in a few times a week to eat and do paperwork.

She said he made her and the other waitresses uncomfortable by staring at them and flirting.

"He watched us girls quite openly," said Beverstock. "His eyes crawled over our shirts and our backsides. He was so open about it that I would try and handle his order as quickly as possible.

"When you didn't smile and flirt back with him, give him an opening, he became rude and demanding," she said.

Pretty sure if Beverly Wilson had been claiming to work at a nonexistent restaurant in 1977, someone local would have noticed. The AL.com heard very quickly from three pastors who wanted their names removed from a supposed letter of support Ms. Moore posted to Facebook Sunday, but which appears to be nothing more than a copy of an earlier list of pastors who had endorsed Roy Moore on his campaign website:

The letter appears to be a version of one already posted on Moore's campaign website. That letter, posted prior to the primary, contains all the same wording as below but with three extra paragraphs at the top, including a sentence referencing the Aug. 15 vote.

Pastor Thad Endicott said he was not contacted about the most recent post from Kayla Moore.

"The list that has recently circulated was evidently copied and pasted from the August endorsements without checking to see if I still endorsed Moore," said Endicott.

Endicott, pastor at Heritage Baptist Church, asked that his name be removed from the Moore endorsement.

AL.com also notes that "at least one of the pastors listed as supporting Moore is no longer at the church listed on the letter." The Moore campaign didn't reply to questions about why the whole post was lifted -- minus the paragraphs about the then-upcoming primary -- from the campaign website. Why, it's almost as if Ms. Moore were fibbing, which a good Christian lady would never do. If the local paper caught that, you can bet a lie about an entire restaurant that didn't exist in 1977 would have been noticed. They're pretty sharp that way, and would definitely have noticed Beverly Wilson was not working as a waitress at a cocktail bar Old Hickory House. Probably Gloria Allred lived there in 1977 and put the restaurant listing in the phone book, as Occam's Razor would suggest.

Then there's this:

That's a link to a Gateway Pundit story about some self-proclaimed handwriting analyst who knows for a fact that the handwriting in Beverly Wilson's high school yearbook couldn't possibly be Roy Moore's, because the loop at the bottom of the "R" is a lot longer in the yearbook than on a signature from when Moore was Chief Justice of Alabama, and also the number "7" looks different in the two dates:

Says the genius handwriting analyst in a tweet, "Unless Moore's handwriting has changed, the yearbook signature is a forgery."

Hmmm... could someone's signature change over 40 years? IMPOSSIBLE! Also, the name of the restaurant is not "Olde" Hickory House, so whoever added the location and exact date was clearly a lazy forger! Or maybe Roy Moore misspelled it in 1977, which seems more likely than a forger's carefully invented evidence falling apart because they neglected to make up the right location? We think a criminal forger would be careful enough not to make a mistake some dope on the internet would freak out about. Or is that simply more proof that there never was an Old Hickory House in 1977 -- a point the "handwriting expert" failed to even consider.

Also, why are we even thinking about this bullshit this much? It's Gateway Pundit. Of course it's bullshit.

Yr Wonkette is supported by reader donations. Please click here to buy Dok some aspirin. Or booze.

[AL.com / Gateway Pundit / Kayla Moore on Facebook / AL.com / Gizmodo]

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.


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