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A ha ha ha, we had to do a Google search to make sure nobody had put that crack in a headline yet. So anyway yes,Michael Steele spoke ill of Rush Limbaugh on late-night television, and then Rush Limbaugh said mean things about Michael Steele on the radio, and then Steele had to apologize because Rush Limbaugh makes a gazillion dollars a year putting cigars in his face and pontificating on the radio whereas Michael Steele is just some loser from Maryland.


There are a couple of sad/funny aspects to this story. Number one: Michael Steele, bless his heart, really is trying to help the Republican party by going on shows like whatever it's called, D.L. Hughley Talks About the News. Obviously he will not win over any young black liberal voters by doing so, but as President Obama has already proved, the point isn't always to win people over -- it's to look like you're trying. Michael Steele appears to be honestly trying to rescue the Republican party from becoming the exclusive province of angry old Southern whites, and that is commendable. It is just too easy to make fun of him, because he says such comical things all the time.

Second: All this outrage over Rush Limbaugh saying he wants President Obama to fail? STOP IT. Stop being outraged. Remember back in the first few years of the war when Republicans were always saying, "Democrats want us to lose! They want President Bush to fail! How awful of them, and unpatriotic!" even though no Democrats actually said they wanted to lose the war? Sure, this case is a little different because Limbaugh did actually say out loud that he wants the president to fail, and also we are not talking about matters of life and death. But the fact remains: it is annoying as shit when you are in the minority party and your motherfucking JOB is to oppose pretty much everything the president does, and the majority party comes out and acts all outraged that you don't support the president.

Anyway, the point is that the rancid megalomaniac Rush Limbaugh now has Michael Steele's testicles, in a jar.

Steele Apologizes To Limbaugh, Praises His Leadership [TPMDC]

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Photo by Daniel Stockman, Creative Commons license 2.0

It's Sunday, and that means it's time for a break from the ongoing grind of awfulness out there. Let's dive into some cool, funny, thoughtful stuff to fortify ourselves before we get back to the daily madness, shall we?

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After watching President Arty McDeals twist in the wind for a month, IRL politician Mitch McConnell finally decided to throw the mook a lifeline. Despite constant screaming about women with duct tape over their mouths, Trump is getting blamed for the shutdown and even his own supporters are starting to turn on him. So Ol' Yertle summoned Mike Pence and Jared Kushner to his chambers for some #RealTalk.

"Tell Donald that he has to offer something so it looks like the Democrats are the ones who won't compromise." He said. (Probably.)

"That's great," squeaked young Jared (allegedly), "Democrats are desperate. We've got them right where we want them." McConnell blinked hard.

"No, Jared," he probably said. "They're not going to take the deal. We'd have more luck getting Mexico to pay for it. The point is to offer something silly so they turn us down, and then we try to convince the public that the shutdown is Democrats' fault."

"I don't get it," said Jared (allegedly), as Mother's boy Pence furrowed his brow and sighed through his nose. (Not allegedly, it's his signature move.)

"I know," Mitch might have said. "Believe me, I know."

Which is how President Teleprompter wound up giving a MAJOR ADDRESS yesterday offering to hold off on deporting some of the Dream Act kids for a hot second if Democrats will just give him $5.7 billion for WALL and let him expel future child arrivals without a hearing. Trump himself rescinded protections for up to a million immigrants brought here as kids as soon as he took office, but he'll let some of those hostages go if Democrats will just give him cash for that WALL that Mexico is "indirectly" paying for. Heck, he'll even let 300,000 people who fled war and natural disasters and put down roots here over decades to stay a little longer, if that's what it takes. He plans to deport them all in three years anyway, or else use them for another round of hostage negotiations. (If we re-elect That Orange Idiot, spit on the ground/sign of the horns/God forbid.)

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