Sarah Huckabee Sanders Hired By Father Of (Trump's) Lies

Donald Trump is the king of lies, a sad and weak little man who lies so much that if his mouth slit is even minimally open, you can be pretty sure he is lying. And Sarah Huckabee Sanders, when she was his press secretary, was the most disgusting asshole liar ever to stand in the White House press briefing room and collect a paycheck for lying on behalf of a lying liar.

But before there was Donald Trump the liar, and before there was Sarah Huckabee Sanders the White House Press Liar, there was Fox News, which has seeded many if not most of the lies Trump and Shuckafuck have told in their time in the public eye. Way back when Trump was just a cranky white supremacist conspiracy theorist grandpa on Twitter, he was obsessed with Fox News. (Now he is a cranky white supremacist conspiracy theorist grandpa on Twitter who also lost the people's vote by three million who is obsessed with Fox News. So we guess we're saying he's even less of a man than he used to be, which is remarkable.) One might even say Fox News is the father of Donald Trump's lies.

So it follows, and is completely expected, that now that Sarah Huckabee Sanders has destroyed the White House press briefing and fucked off to Arkansas to get out of our face, that she would choose to get back in our face and demand cheese plates so she could collect a paycheck for lying on Fox News, the father of Donald Trump's lies.

That's right we Shithole Sanders is officially going to work for the Father of Lies. But hasn't she been this whole time, really?

"FOX News has been the number one news organization in the country for 17 years running and I am beyond proud to join their incredible stable of on-air contributors in providing political insights and analysis," she said in a statement.

Yeah OK fuck you whatever.

By the way, the New York Times has a long profile on the new Sarah Huckabee Sanders, whose name is actually Stephanie Grisham, who sounds like a REAL shit. You'd be forgiven for not knowing there was a new Sarah Huckabee Sanders, because in this White House, official policy is for the president to scream lies at reporters who don't ask good followup questions or call him on his lies, while they all go deaf listening to Marine One roar in the background. Who needs a press secretary?

Besides, nobody will ever lie like the original Shuckamouth, so it's probably #BeBest that Grisham doesn't even try.

Anyway! This is now your open thread! And if you live in Anacortes, Washington, this is also your reminder that you have a Wonkette meet-up tonight from 5:30 to 7:30 p.m. at Washington Park, which should be very exciting! So enjoy that! OK, goodbye!

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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