Donate

Drudge Sirens for the culmination of the most unsurprising long tease of the political year, please. It's finally official: Prettyboy hair-mass Scott Brown hasannounced that he's running for Senate in New Hampshire, where he hopes to defeat incumbent Sen. Jeanne Shaheen. And despite the fact that as recently as December, his trusty pickup-truck prop still had Massachusetts plates (a problem he's since corrected), and even though he once hilariously mangled the state's motto as "Live Free and Die," Brown's supporters want you to know that Scott Brown is a New Hampshire almost-native through and through, and he didn't really mean it when he was Senatoring for that other state next door. And former New Hampshire Gov. John Sununu wants everybody to know that in moving to New Hampshire to run, Scott Brown is "coming back to his roots” and is definitely not a carpetbagger, while Jeanne Shaheen totally is a complete outsider who is not Of The Body. That should be interesting.


You see, here's how it works, according to Sununu's Native New Hampshire DNA Test: Brown may have been elected to the Senate from Massachusetts, you see, but Shaheen is the real carpetbagger:

“She votes with Elizabeth Warren. She votes with [Massachusetts Democratic Sen. Ed] Markey. She is the third senator from Massachusetts,” Sununu told supporters at the Portsmouth rally before introducing Brown. “Scott’s happiest days as a young man were in New Hampshire. …So it’s going to be great to have a senator that was born virtually in the state of New Hampshire. Jean Shaheen [sic], by the way, was born in Missouri!”

We would like to know more about this "born virtually" concept, and whether it is anything like being born again; also, does a state have ways to shut that down?

Still, Yahoo News reporter Chris Moody notes that portraying Shaheen as an outsider may be a bit of a challenge, what with her having lived in New Hampshire for decades and all. But since teabaggers have managed to portray a Heritage Foundation plan to get people to buy private insurance from for-profit companies as a socialist government takeover of healthcare, portraying a three-term governor as an exotic newcomer to the state shouldn't be too much of a challenge.

Wherever he's actually from, Scott Brown has a super-creative strategy to win in the fall: He will run against Obamacare, which is pretty unsurprising, but there's no telling whether that's going to be enough to beat Shaheen, who remains popular and in a recent poll led Brown 45% to 35%. Then again, maybe his virtually native status will work for him a little better than Liz Cheney's Wyoming roots worked for her.

[Yahoo News / WaPo]

Follow Doktor Zoom on Twitter. He lives in Boise, but isn't particularly "from" anywhere.

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

Donate

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)

Newsletter

©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc