Second Amendment Saves At Least 10 At Community College From Being Alive, F*ck You America
Jesus probably wants you to buy more guns now
Welcome to your Latest Mass Shooting, America! At 10:40 AM local time, an as-yet unidentified gunman opened fire at Umpqua Community College in Roseburg, Oregon, leaving at
least 7-10 10 people dead and approximately 7 wounded (see updates at end of post). The shooting reportedly began in or near the campus science building, Snyder Hall. Early reports -- not yet confirmed -- are that the shooter has been either "neutralized" or "apprehended." A livestream of Portland TV station KATU is available here; early information is of course uncertain and chaotic, and we have to say that KATU's staff is being very careful to clarify what's confirmed and what's not. KATU reports that the campus is being evacuated, with students being transported by bus to the Douglas County fairgrounds.
Needless to say, it is far too soon to talk about guns, because the easy availability of firearms is not a problem in America. As of the end of August, when two reporters in Virginia were murdered by a former co-worker, the nation had experienced roughly one mass shooting per day, so let's add 30 to the total then (247) say that this was something like the 275th mass shooting of 2015. We'll update that as soon as we can. Also, get ready for the inevitable Truthers to crawl out from under the rocks, because nothing bad ever happens, and it's just a ploy to take our guns away.
But, again, it's far too soon to talk about guns, except of course to demand that more people carry them at all times, legalize concealed carry on campuses, and be ready to shoot anyone at any time. Take a moment, if you must, to keep the people of Roseburg and Douglas County in your thoughts today, and then please go buy more guns. It's the American thing to do.
Update 3:55 EDT: Thank goodness, we're already getting some leadership on this tragedy. The Washington Post's Philip Bump tweets:
UPDATE 4:20 EDT: CBS reports that Oregon's attorney general now says 13 people have died. The Oregonian is reporting that the shooter is dead. Oregon Gov. Kate Brown is expected to speak to reporters shortly.
UPDATE 5:00 EDT: Gov. Brown just completed a very brief press conference in which she said the shooter, now deceased, was a 20-year-old male.
UPDATE 8:05 EDT: The Douglas County Sheriff's office is now reporting 10 fatalities and 7 injuries in the shooting, numbers lower than previously reported by the state attorney general.
You can watch President Obama's statement on the shooting here.
Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.