'Fox & Friends' Idiot Ainsley Earhardt Just Saying Maybe It Is Time For BANK RUN!11!1!1!

It may not be easy to quickly grasp exactly why Silicon Valley Bank collapsed. Heather Cox Richardson's newsletter is a good place to start.

Not a good place to start? The grunting idiots who sit on the "Fox & Friends" couch. Unfortunately there are people in America who turn on Fox in the morning and think they are watching the news. Dumbfucks might as well be watching cartoons.

And those dumbfucks got to see this highly intellectual discussion this morning, which included host Ainsley Earhardt saying BANK RUN!111! BANK ruUUUUUnnnn!NN!N!

BRIAN KILMEADE (CO-HOST): So, this guy David Sacks, who's well respected, general partner of Craft Ventures, he's on a podcast and he's saying he thinks more could — that more banks could go down this road. And then, Wall Street Journal writes today in their editorial that he is a "panic spreader." So, to take it easy today and don't let this ripple through the economy. There's other fear is if you get rid of the regional banks, if all the regional banks say "okay if they fail, I fail," and if we could become a country run by four major banks we all lose.

LAWRENCE JONES (CO-HOST): I understand not ensuing panic. But I think it's time to be honest with the American people at the same time.

The talking windsocks on "Fox & Friends" are being honest. Much of the news right now is about how Fox News openly and knowingly lies to the feral hogs watching at home, but "Fox & Friends" is gonna be honest.

It's definitely not that these vile anal abscesses are bursting with excitement fantasizing about a financial crisis happening on Joe Biden's watch. Surely not.

AINSLEY EARHARDT (CO-HOST): We need to go to our banks and take our money out.

Oh for fucks sake.

JONES: Well, I mean, I think if you're above that $250,000 mark.

And do goddamned what with it?

Blah blah blah, more words happened after that. You think it can't get stupider but Brian Kilmeade made it stupider.

KILMEADE: They were heavily into equity and all these Pride days around the world. Where is your focus on regulation and risk? And I think that there's an imbalance there.

And now we transition into how this bank collapsed because of WOKE.

Today's conservative media figures and politicians, all of them very serious people, either believe or are pretending to believe that banks and the military and whoever else are focusing on LGBTQ+ pride instead of preventing bad things from happening. It's the same as their belief that if Pete Buttigieg wasn't making the Transportation Department so gay, all the planes wouldn't have fallen out of the sky and derailed that train in Ohio. (Or whatever they are saying.)

It is one of the stupidest and most deranged -- but more importantly, stupidest -- trains of thought to come out of the conservative movement in decades. And that's saying something.

But again, Fox Newslies for ratings, so we shouldn't assume the hosts themselves are so stupid they believe these things. It's their grubby, smelly viewers.

Should we assume Republican House Oversight Committee Chair James Comer really is that stupid when he stands there on TV with his unnaturally square head and talks about how Silicon Valley Bank is "woke"? We think so, yeah. We feel in our hearts that James Comer is that stupid.

But he's also just reading from the same talking points they all are. For one thing, obviously, when a conservative says "woke," the word is devoid of meaning apart from "thing I don't like." (Real Americans think the actual definition of the word "woke" is a good thing to be.)

Media Matters collected a bunch of examples of these glue-eaters saying this happened because the bank was "woke." Charlie Kirk suggested the bank should have spent more time figuring out whether it could guarantee its loans, and less on "woke." He babbled on and on and on: "Did Silicon Valley Bank get distracted about the mirage and the hologram of diversity, equity, inclusion, rather than running a business? Is this the first modern-era woke bank collapse?”

Tucker Carlson said the bank was too focused on “pioneering glass-ceiling-shattering women." Ron DeSantis said they were “so concerned with DEI and politics,” it “diverted from them focusing on their core mission." As if they had a business meeting one day and said "Let's NOT do the bank parts of our job, and instead just do the gay parts." Donald Trump Jr. said a thing.

It's been constant. They really are all reading the exact same talking points.

Every one of them.

"These types never fail to use every chance to play their sad grievance violin, no matter how unrelated." Ain't that the damn truth.

And it is weapons-grade stupid.

In some kind of parallel reality, we could have a country where the parties disagree on economic and financial policy, and have actual arguments about how things like this happen and what to do about it. We do not live in that reality. Instead one entire party -- the same party, incidentally, whose last president incited his garbage followers to commit an act of domestic terrorism in order to overturn the government -- is incessantly babbling about how the bank failed because the bank was too nice to people who aren't white supremacist Christian fascist men who at least claim to be straight.

That's our country now.

And the dumbfuck "Fox & Friends" woman is telling people to pull their money out of the banks.


[Media Matters]

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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