Skoalrebel: "finally a new vid dippin good ole grizz bear green"

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September 30, 2009 02:02 PM

"I'm up to 223 subscribers... I don't know why y'all motherfuckers fuckin' subscribe to me when all y'all gonna do is fuckin' talk shit about me." [YouTube]

Wonkette

shortpost scientology tony ortega shelly miscavige cults leah remini scientology kidnapping scientology harassment scientology stalking scientology beatings amy scobee praise xenu scientology cult

Please Don't Kidnap, Beat, Harass Or Stalk Us, Church Of Scientology!

Praise Xenu and shit.

popular

The Church of Scientology had some thoughts about Our Robyn's piece, Who Wants To Watch A Creepy White Guy Rap About Scientology? We had some thoughts about their thoughts.

Thanks for writing in, Scientology! As you doubtless realized when you didn't demand we take down our story, but requested it instead, our opinions of your weird cult and that poor young man's rap skills are protected by the First Amendment. (I learned about libel law in college and grad school but also on the job: I was in newspapers so long that I was actually colleagues with Tony Ortega -- about whom you sound quite "venomous" and "biased" -- at the very same newspaper chain you can't believe he defended! Next up, please show your due diligence by talking trash about a woman you didn't know was my mom.)

Also, a lot of your former members say on the record that you kidnap people, and stalk them, and harass them, and sometimes beat them up good, and I request that if so, fucking stop it.

The rest of you click the headline, if you want your OPEN THREAD.

President Words-Stupid Sorry For Being Total Fuck-Up Just This One Time Ever

Dear media: DO NOT FALL FOR THIS SHIT.

Russia

Monday's Trump-Putin press conference landed on the entire free world like a hot treason-shaped turd, didn't it? Congressional Republicans have been saying mean things about it on Twitter, and even Fox News has been less than 100% supportive! The White House communications department obviously knew it had a crisis on its hands, what with how it's generally considered inappropriate for the leader of the free world to get on all fours in front of the Russian president and wag his tail and slobber with anticipation while he awaits his next marching orders. WOMP WOMP, etc.

So the comms department typed up a thing for the president to read aloud today at the beginning of his meeting with members of Congress, about how he was VERY SORRY he said one word incorrectly during the Putin presser. That's right, only one word of that whole fucking shitshow was wrong. All the rest of his traitor words were exactly what he meant to say.

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