8:23 -- Guess who can't go to the State of the Union speech? Alberto Gonzales! Because just in case the aliens blow up this joint session, somebody from the White House must be able to continue illegally torturing people all over the world.

8:26 -- The motorcade is about to leave the White House! In, uhm, about 10 minutes! He still has a chance to escape to Paraguay.

8:29 -- Nancy Pelosi wouldn't let the Sergeant at Arms introduce her, so he only gets to introduce the other guy, what's his name, Freedom Boy.

8:36 -- Hillary's giving her own pre-rebuttal right now, on the Keith Olbermann show! Too bad nobody is watching it. Ha ha, just kidding, Keith! (Don't have us murdered like Vince Foster, Hillary.)

8:51 -- Everybody already read the speech, so it's all pretty much about waiting for the aliens to strike so Alberto Gonzales can be King of Torture, and whatever crazy shawl Nancy Pelosi will be wearing.

8:55 -- Katrina is forgiven! Bush won't mention New Orleans, our own little Baghdad.

8:58 -- Cheney looks really happy to be chatting it up with Pelosi.

8:59 -- Ha ha, Wonkette's publishing system is broken. Maybe it will work again before Bush does his thing.

9:02 -- Brit Hume is sorta like Tony Snow's mom.

9:03 -- It's going to be awesome to be taxed for health insurance. We should be taxed for other money we never see, too ... what about taxing payroll taxes?

9:03 -- Lynne & Laura have been seated, and here come some people walking through the thing ... oh, it's some of those Supreme Court people. Hello, Chief Justice John Edwards!

9:04 Let's start a new post for the actual Mr. Blabby Blab.