Your Wonkette's Liz Glover and I are here at the University of Pennsylvania's basketball gymnasium, in Philadelphia, at a rally for Hillary Clinton. We both want to vomit everywhere until dead several times over. Liz may have vomited already, but who knows, because she is mostly likely still getting sniffed by Secret Service bomb/drug dogs. Sucker! The treats inside include a never-ending a cappella performance (I totally know the singer!) as well as Ohio Rep. Stephanie Tubbs Jones SHOUTIN BOUT HILRY REAL LOUD.

The political journalist next to me says that his friend in the traveling Clinton press corps was at least an hour to an hour-and-a-half late for this deal. Here's the traveling press corps reserved space, which they will not let me or any other "writer" into. Liz Glover, however, is somehow in the traveling press corps space right now.

OH AND IT STEPH TUBBS: