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Couldn't find a pic of Hoft and Bannon together. But Bannon IS a horcrux for the guy on the left.


Jim Hoft, the Stupidest Man on the Internet, saw some video of Nancy Pelosi calling President Steve Bannon a "White Supremacist," and he is super-angry! What's more, Hoft knows exactly what needs to happen now!

We think perhaps Mr. Hoft has only a very tenuous grasp of both the First Amendment and libel laws. As a public figure, and more pertinently, now a public official, Steve Bannon has about as much chance of successfully suing Nancy Pelosi for calling him a "White Supremacist" as Nancy Pelosi would of suing Jim Hoft for calling her "unhinged." But let's see what horrifying thing Nancy Pelosi said about the former Breitbart CEO and newest permanent member of the National Fucking Security Goddamned Council:

Well, hell, let's add "quotation marks" to the list of things Hoft doesn't understand -- Hoft's headline has Pelosi saying a thing she actually did not say. She called President Bannon a "White Supremacist on the National Security Council," not a "White Supremacist in the White House" (yes, this is a nitpick but it's fun).

Now, Jim Hoft knows Steve Bannon personally, and he happens to know that Steve Bannon is "Not a Racist Crackpot Like Rev. Wright or Terrorist Bomber Like Bill Ayers," which really is just about the highest possible compliment. Maybe Bannon will someday have that engraved on his tombstone (after he dies alone and unloved, of natural causes, many years from now). To return the favor, we shall say that we don't know Mr. Hoft, but we're pretty sure he is not a serial killer like Jeffrey Dahmer, nor is he quite as stupid as Daisy, the un-housebreakable border collie once owned by noted political pundit Our Girlfriend. At least so we assume; if photos of Mr. Hoft pooping right in the middle of a grisly crime scene come forward, we will of course run a correction.

As to Hoft's character defense of Mr. Bannon, we have to say that "absolutely NO EVIDENCE Steve Bannon has any inks [sic] at all to any racist group" would be an excellent defense against the claim that Bannon belongs to an organized racist group, but doesn't really get at whether Bannon is a white supremacist or sympathetic to white nationalist ideology. (He probably is, and he definitely is.) It's not Nancy Pelosi, after all, who proudly touted Breitbart.com as "a platform for the alt-right." As to whether it's actually defamatory to call him a white supremacist, we'd love to see the depositions in that lawsuit, which would include any number of fine public comments Bannon has made about the foreign hordes who are changing America into a very bad place. Ah, but as long as he's never actually said That One Word, he can flirt with racists, provide them a platform, and bask in their love, all while plausibly claiming he's merely a nationalist, not a white nationalist, at least under rightwing rules. He just doesn't like foreigns, especially Muslims, is all (and here come all the Deleted Commenters informing us that "Muslim" is not a race, so there!).

In conclusion, Jim Hoft is stupid and wrong, and he also still owes us $3150. Pay up, Butthead.

[Gateaway Pundit / The Hill / WaPo / USA Today]

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

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How do you do, fellow libs? We come together tonight to cheer and clap and cry and laugh, with our leader, Elizabeth Warren, and her fellow nice people Jay Inslee (the gold standard in climate action), Beto O'Rourke (excellent on being a good ally mostly), Cory Booker (best corny love hippie but also Wall Street, it's weird), Julian Castro (I don't know, people are super into him despite his creepy twinness and his too much pomade), Amy Klobuchar (bad bitch), Bill de Blasio ( ... ), John Delaney (???), and Tim Ryan and Tulsi Gabbard.

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We know, the thing we said in our headline is a thing you can say every day, but it's really intense today, maybe because Donald Trump is now filled with fear of the inescapable reality that millions of Americans who have not read the Mueller Report are going to see Robert Mueller testify on live TV on July 17, and Donald Trump will be exposed. Maybe the Big Mac vending machine next to his golden toilet is on the fritz and he hasn't had gotten to eat a Big Mac on the poop chair since last night. Maybe he's just a weak and sad person, a collection of shithole cells God meant to throw in the garbage, but accidentally implanted in Mary Trump's turkey incubator. We imagine that'd lead to a pretty constant state of anxiety and ennui.

Whatever it is, he's totally fucked right now. We were going to write a nice post about Trump's batshit interview on Fox Business with Maria Bartiromo, but we were busy, and by the time we got to it, he had performed so many batshit feats that we're just going to stick them all in this one post.

Let's start with the fight he's trying to wage with US soccer star Megan Rapinoe, who in a now-viral video stated that she has no fuckin' interest in going to the White House to meet that idiot. He got into a quarrel with her on Twitter ... or at least with a Twitter account that didn't belong to her. It's now been replaced, in order that the adult president may shit-tweet at the soccer superstar who hurt his feelings, but Splinter grabbed the original:

The rant continued:

Right. And Megan Rapinoe just said win or lose, she has no interest in meeting your crusty ass, because no decent American would consider that an honor.

Besides, she has already been to the White House to meet a legitimately elected president:

By the by, the owner of the incorrect Megan Rapinoe account saw Trump's whining and told him to grow a dick and set it on fire:

Ya burnt!

But as we said, it was a whole day of batshit from Trump, so let's continue.

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