Hello Wonks! With cabinet members getting terminated by Trump faster than his likely (ALLEGED!) unprotected sex induced pregnancies, we figured we'd check in with Kellyanne Conway, who will never leave, to see what she's been up to the past couple of days. Spoiler: she thinks her husband is an idiot.

Conway made multiple appearance on the Sunday shows to spin the "truth" on Trump's replacement of Confederate Keebler Elf Jeff Sessions ...

Now who's gonna let police keep killing people of color?

...with Wilson Fisk lookalike and Sessions's former chief of staff, Matt Whitaker.

I'm sure its a coincidence he looks like The Kingpin...

On ABC's "This Week," Conway was confronted with a clip of Trump saying. "I can tell you Matt Whitaker's a great guy. I mean, I know Matt Whitaker," after denying he knew the stooge he appointed as acting AG. Conway, as usual, brought her trademarked "charm":

CONWAY: The president is saying he didn't know him before. I mean, he's not slotting in just an old friend of his. He's actually elevating --

STEPHANOPOULOS: But I don't know -- twice, just what we just showed.

CONWAY:...What the president means is he's not slotting in somebody that's an old friend or somebody he thinks that he's discussed the Mueller investigation with at length. There's actually no -- no evidence to me that Mr. Whitaker knows anything about the ongoing Mueller investigation...

Stephanopoulos pressed Conway on the absurdity of this but she did not let that stop her:

CONWAY: Well he's saying -- no, no, he's saying I don't know him, he's saying I don't him well or I didn't know him before. He said in your last part of the clip I didn't know him before except that he was the chief of staff and that he's highly respected. That's all he means.

So Trump just looked at the Justice Department and picked a guy at random? Here we all thought he was "evading the requirement to seek the Senate's advice and consent for the nation's chief law enforcement officer and the person who will oversee the Mueller investigation." At least that's what it said in that New York Times op-ed on the subject by Neal K. Katyal and ... George T. Conway, husband of Kellyanne Conway!

Stephanopoulos of course brought up the op-ed, which stated that "Trump's installation of Matthew Whitaker as acting attorney general of the United States after forcing the resignation of Jeff Sessions is unconstitutional, it's illegal, and it means that anything Mr. Whitaker does or tries to do in that position is invalid."

Kellyanne Conway repudiated her husband and stated the pecking order:

CONWAY: So, a few things, people disagree -- spouses disagree every day. I'm sure you can appreciate.

STEPHANOPOULOS: So, you don't agree with your husband's argument?

CONWAY : No, I don't. But it's also not relevant. In other words, people disagree on the Constitution, that's why we have a U.S. circuit court system and indeed a United States Supreme Court...But more to this point, the journalist asking the president of the United States the question referred to him as Kellyanne's husband. And he is referred to [as] Kellyanne Conway's husband, or Kellyanne's husband far more often than he's referred to even by his first name.

Then she threw some shade:

STEPHANOPOULOS: So, the president makes that Mr. Kellyanne Conway.

CONWAY: ...I offer my advice and opinion to the president in private. I don't need to put on the op-ed pages of any -- and by the way, none of this will be litigated in newspapers, or on TV.

And concluded with the most unintentionally hilarious lines of the whole interview:

CONWAY: He (Trump) is really great to the women who work for him and he also is pointing out that I – that he – again, my – my husband's known as me. I'll keep that – I'll keep the rest of the question private. I don't think it's nice and I think people questioning publicly aspects of our marriage and the rest of our life is very inappropriate because I stay out of other people's lives.

Yes, I'm sure Mrs "Noun, Verb and Bill/Hillary Clinton" deserves the same respect she gives others' personal lives.

Conway also appeared on "Fox News Sunday" where Chris Wallace asked about the White House revoking the press pass of CNN's Jim Acosta over the supposed "assault" of a White House intern, as seen below in a dramatic recreation.

Why Jim?? Why???!!!DC Comics

Wallace brought up the fact that Sarah Sanders shared an altered video of the encounter. One that appears borrowed from InfoWars fuckboi Paul Joseph Watson:

This was roundly condemned by others:

Conway, of course, had a different interpretation:

CONWAY: Well, Chris, first of all, what do you mean by edited or, as others are saying, quote, doctored video? He either put his hands on her and grabbed the mic back, or he did not. And he clearly did.

WALLACE: No. He -- he really did -- but the video was altered and there are experts who have looked at it -- to make it --

CONWAY: By that do you mean sped up?

WALLACE: -- speed it up to make it look -- pardon?

CONWAY: Oh, well, that's not altered. That's sped up.

But alternative facts, amirite?

This has been a nice visit with Kellyanne Conway, just kidding no it hasn't.

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Michael Mora

Pop Culture observer & Comics fan. Amateur Movie Reviewer. Political Freelance Writer @wonkette. Marine, Husband & Dad. Opinions are mine only.

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Once upon a time... about ten years ago, a group of entirely ridiculous men burst onto the scene wearing stupid hats and telling men that wearing stupid hats and telling men that walking up to women in bars and insulting ("negging") them would get them laid. This did not last long, as women also had televisions and computers and were completely aware of these tricks as well, so when some ass came up to us in a bar and said "Hey, nice nails, are they real?" we would laugh and laugh and loudly announce "Oh my god, this guy just tried to neg me! Can you believe that shit? HEY EVERYONE, THIS GUY JUST TRIED TO NEG ME!" and then refer to him as "Mystery" the whole night.

Most of the men who tried that shit only did so a few times before realizing that it wasn't going to work, and thus moved on to other things. Perhaps things that did not involve furry hats and coming off as a huge creep. We may never know, because I would assume that those who tried it are now extremely embarrassed and would never, ever admit to this to us.

Still, there were a few men willing to eat that shit up, as well as some grifters willing to take advantage of that. Said grifters tended to be extremely misogynistic and seemed more like they were teaching men how to be as despised by women as they were than teaching them how to actually be liked by women.

Some of them, like Roosh V, a creepy weirdo who actually does live in his mom's basement, actively encouraged men to rape women who were intoxicated to the point of being obviously unable to consent.

However, even that branch of the PUA tree is wilting away. Many "self-help" style PUA forums like Nextasf and RSDnation are shutting down or have already shut down. In March, Chateau Heartiste, a batshit crazy PUA turned White Nationalist/Alt-Right blog was shut down by Wordpress. This week, rape advocate Roosh V (whom you may recall once called yours truly a "Wonkette typist/clown face, would not bang") announced that he was renouncing his PUA ways and devoting himself to Jesus. He explained to the forum he manages that he would no longer be allowing anyone to discuss premarital "fornication."

Keep reading... Show less
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'Baby Geniuses' star Jon Voight took to Twitter early this morning to proclaim his undying love for Donald Trump, probably because there is no one left in his life who will listen to him talk about this, or anything else, in person. In this video rant, Voight encouraged members of the Republican Party, whom he apparently thinks are the only real citizens of the United States, to stand by Donald Trump and "acknowledge the truth" that he is the best President since Abraham Lincoln.

Part ONE:

People of the Republican Party, I know you will agree with me when I say our president has our utmost respect and our love. This job is not easy. For he's battling the left and their absurd words of destruction. I've said this once and I'll say this again. That our nation has been built on the solid ground from our forefathers, and there is a moral code of duty that has been passed on from President Lincoln. I'm here today to acknowledge the truth, and I'm here today to tell you my fellow Americans that our country…

Oh no, not our absurd words of destruction!

Part DEUX:

is stronger, safer, and with more jobs because our President has made his every move correct. Don't be fooled by the political left, because we are the people of this nation that is witnessing triumph. So let us stand with our president. Let us stand up for this truth, that President Trump is the greatest president since President Lincoln.

Does Jon Voight not know there have been... other presidents? Can he name them? Because really, it does not sound like it. Does he also not know that a very big chunk of the Republican Party actually does not care very much for Abraham Lincoln? Namely those defenders of Confederate statues that Trump called "very fine people?" Also, did he intentionally diss their beloved Ronald Reagan?

Who can know? Who can even tell what he is trying to say or why he is trying to say it. He doesn't appear to have tweeted much since 2016, so I'm guessing whoever's job it was to keep him from tanking his career quit. Either that... or after filming the seventh season of Ray Donovan, he found out it's going to be canceled or his character is getting killed off or something and he is now free to be a jackass? I don't know, I haven't watched the show, although my parents are very into it and mad that I haven't watched it. Literally all I know about it is that it has something to do with Boston, because they keep mentioning that to me like it's a selling point.

It seems useless at this point to note that the people who scream their faces off about how bad it is for Hollywood celebs to support liberal causes, and how they should keep their politics to themselves, etc. etc. make a way bigger deal than normal people do whenever a Big Time Hollywood Celebrity like Jon Voight or, uh, Scott Baio, supports their cause. Mostly because they're the only ones who have elected a reality TV star and the star of Bedtime for Bonzo (who by the way, also once practically ruined a perfectly good Bette Davis movie with his bad acting. Which is not to say that Dark Victory is not fantastic and probably the best thing to watch if you want to sob your face off, but he was very bad in it.) to run the country.

But we might as well do that anyway, because it actually never stops being funny.

[Jon Voight Twitter]

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