TV Nerds Who Are Utter Bombshells Out Of Character! Tabs, Fri., Jan. 8, 2021

News
Tabs gifs by your friend Martini Ambassador!

Junior's Capital Riot VIP room, lucky Junior!

Because some of you extra fairminded people think I am fake newsing, because this VIP room was for the rally before the riot: I consider them the same thing. This is their VIP room from which Rudy Giuliani went out and told people to do trial by combat, and from which President Trump issued and incited the crowd to march forth. This tweet is here for the video, not for its description of Junior et al. "watching and supervising the violence." This is your clarifier.


What do foreign security and counterintel officials think about Wednesday's attempted coup? What do you think they think? — Business Insider

We're starting to get more reporting on WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK CAPITOL POLICE. (AP) Capitol Police chief resigning, oh you think? (AP again) A tick-tock of the "monumental failure." (WaPo)

Good fucking god:

"I was actually on the phone with Leader Hoyer who was pleading with us to send the guard," [Maryland Gov. Larry] Hogan said. "He was yelling across the room to Schumer and they were back and forth saying we do have the authorization and I'm saying, 'I'm telling you we do not have the authorization.' "

Hogan said Maj. Gen. Timothy Gowen, the adjutant general of the Maryland National Guard, was repeatedly rebuffed by the Pentagon.

Gowen "kept running it up the flagpole, and we don't have authorization," Hogan said. "We don't have authorization."

Ninety minutes later, Hogan said, he received a call "out of the blue, not from the secretary of defense, not through what would be normal channels," but from Ryan McCarthy, the secretary of the Army. McCarthy asked if the Maryland guardsmen could "come as soon as possible," Hogan recounted.

Lawyer up, evvvvvverybody. — Washington Post

The president's attorney Lin Wood wrote on Parler after the riot, "get the firing squad ready" and "Pence goes first." Gosh, that sounds bad, is that bad? (Forbes)


"This is not America," a woman said to a small group, her voice shaking. She was crying, hysterical. "They're shooting at us. They're supposed to shoot BLM, but they're shooting the patriots." (The Nation)

Chicago police union president John Catanzara thinks you're all being meeeean to the traaaaaitors. Chicago police union president John Catanzara can get fucked. — WBEZ

Republicans warned this day would come. Then they forgot. (NBC News)

Joe Scarborough wants Trump and Junior and Giuliani ARRESTED YESTERTODAY. This is some live-TV cussing mad!

John Kelly: 25A The Motherfucker Already. (Politico)

Former Missouri Senator John Danforth calls supporting Josh Hawley "the worst mistake" of his life. (STL Post Dispatch)

Fascism has consequences.

Are you familiar with the Wall Street Journal? Its news pages are widely regarded as excellent; its opinion pages are widely regarded as lunatical. You do not have to have a subscription; they cost one million dollars a month. So let us give you the skinny, because we do pay for that shit (they did some really good Russia reporting we needed to be able to see):

Wall Street Journal hed: The best outcome would be for him to resign to spare the US another impeachmnt fight.

Ahem, let us get out our blockquote:

This was an assault on the constitutional process of transferring power after an election. It was also an assault on the legislature from an executive sworn to uphold the laws of the United States. This goes beyond merely refusing to concede defeat. In our view it crosses a constitutional line that Mr. Trump hasn't previously crossed. It is impeachable.

Despite that passive construction: Is it fucking ever. (WSJ)

Oh hey breaking, BETSY DEVOS just resigned, citing the president being an insurrectionist choad. Like, naming names, saying I can't continue, etc. If you're resigning to avoid 25Aing someone, you don't say THEY SHOULD GET OUT. So there you have it, I gotta go I'm drunk, GOODBYE.


How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)

Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.

Donate

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)

Newsletter

©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc