You Won't Believe How Strict Prince George And Princess Charlotte's Nanny Is! Tabs, Mon., Aug. 3, 2020

Tabs gifs by your friend Martini Ambassador!

Your children's noses are lousy with coronavirus. (New York Times)

Sick schoolkids could send Florida off a cliff. — Daily Beast

The best-case coronavirus scenario for the US is horrific. So that's neat. (Daily Beast again)

We don't want to have no confidence in Dr. Deborah Birx; she did that herself.

How many people in the United States are hospitalized with coronavirus? NOBODY KNOWS! Thanks Trump :D (ProPublica)

Because it is relevant: "On Sex With Demons." — Going Medieval

DC Circuit Court tells Neomi Rao to fuck off, rehears her shit Michael Flynn decision. — Liz over at Above the Law

The idiots are more persuasive about climate change than we are, and yes that includes James Inhofe's snowball. (Grist)

Interesting story from art critic Christopher Knight about Placerville, and why they should chop down the lynching tree on their city seal. (Because it is a lynching tree!) — LA Times

Happy sigh: The Tree Who Set Health Boundaries. Do click!

Deep breath: Ten bucks left and nowhere to go. How the pandemic and a broken unemployment system are upending people's lives. (Washington Post)

The corporations that built those unemployment systems are getting new state contracts to keep them going. (The Markup)

According to NBC, the broken unemployment system poses "a new threat" to Trump's reelection. (NBC News)

Which is undoubtedly why he lied this, and made my head spin off my neck!

LOL what time is it? It's time for a TONE RESET! — WaPo

Kavanaugh tried his damnedest to avoid Trump's tax case. — Vanity Fair

What the fuck is this? Navy SEAL dogs attack target in Kaepernick jersey. (Task and Purpose)

Yestertoday I made the following crumbles (fruit topped with brown sugar, flour and butter in basically equal parts, NOT OATS, those are CRISPS):


apple blueberry,

pineapple blueberry,

pineapple peach,

and cherry blueberry.

A) If apple, add some lemon juice, sugar, vanilla, cinnamon, nutmeg, cardamom; if all the other ones, you don't need the lemon juice PROBABLY, who can say? B) buy a pastry cutter to cut the butter into the flour and sugar instead of using the "two butter knives method," because it is not the 1950s, you should not have to suffer; C) oh, butter your pie plates! and bake at 350 for 30 minutes and then check to see if it's browned or not, if it's not, bake it some more!

Which caused one of you to send me a link about SAVORY CRUMBLES. Eating all the food in the world, be back never. (

Do your Amazon shopping through this link, because reasons.

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Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.


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