Tabs gifs by your friend Martini Ambassador!

Texas Lt. Gov. Dan Patrick had a press conference. It was awesome! — Judd Legum's Popular Info

The Congressman and His Wingman. (Politico)

His wingman's outside contracts, before he had to resign for "arrested," are HILARIOUS. Please do treat yourself to this devastating local column from 2019. Oh did I say hilarious? I meant infuriating. Joel Greenberg, stay in jail FOR EVER. — Orlando Sentinel

I started to read this op-ed on corporate tax rates by Janet Yellen, but it was boring and I stopped. (Wall Street Journal)

Hey Joe Biden, what is up?


Aw, no corporations want to pay Elaine Chao millions of dollars to do jack shit, aw. (Washington Post)

Prager U's getting into your kids' kindergarten, oh sweet Jesus. — The American Prospect

Well it's a good thing North Carolina still has a D governor for now, since their lege is trying to mandate that teachers have to narc out any kids to their parents if they see them acting trans-y, or "displaying gender nonconformity." (NBC News)

Story fucked up, I could only skim it. "Stet." Have to go lie down some again. (Fireside Fiction)

Is the Derek Chauvin trial a tipping point for the Blue Wall of Silence? — NBC News

The ... eh?

Oh I see! She went to a bakery instead of the border because the border isn't in Chicago. Happy to help, Daily Mail!

This is a commercial by Red Bull, the company, which does not make Red Bull, it just markets it, via a Bulwark newsletter about Red Bull, Elon Musk, stonks, and whether Marjorie Taylor Greene actually needs to do anything with her life (probably not) and whether Matt Gaetz is in any trouble besides maybe going to prison (nope). It was a good newsletter.

It sucks to shit on people's weddings, who would even want to do that, so: Here is a wedding. I am sure it was beautiful and meaningful to all involved. (Vogue)

Scott Rudin, a dick! — The Hollywood Reporter

Make 17 pounds of basil liqueur that will keep in the fridge for all of a week? I'LL DO IT! (Because the other recipes were for Irish Cream and something with fennel, which is great in your chicken hole, not so much in your booze.) — Liquor

You are physically hurting me, Quick Seared Scallops With Pomegranate and Meyer Lemon. (Food and Wine)

Do your Amazon shopping through this link, because reasons.

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