Incredibly Rare Crossbreed Dogs That Are Breaking The Internet! Tabs, Thurs., Sept. 10, 2020

Incredibly Rare Crossbreed Dogs That Are Breaking The Internet! Tabs, Thurs., Sept. 10, 2020
Tabs gifs by your friend Martini Ambassador!

Hack defends decision to keep Trump's coronavirus secrets until his book is ready. — AP

The AP pulls a New York Fucking By God Times with an explanation that you just have to choose what is real, Trump's happy rosy world of the pandemic being over and the economy being awesome, or Stinky Joe Biden's Badtimes Emporium. What fun! — Eric Boehlert at Press Run

Supreme Court justices Ted Cruz and Tom Cotton? Eh, he's just trying to get our heads to essplode. (Axios)

Trump Junior: Haven't we all killed some people when we were young and dumb and 17? — Joe My God

Janis Ian - At Seventeen (1975)

Let's all make Dr. Paul Alexander A STAR. No, he's not the good kind of STAR. More like the kind of STAR that eats a galaxy, don't ask me if that's what stars do, I am not a physics. — Politico

Oh thanks for this inner tab, Politico: Half a million kids have caught coronavirus in the US and more than a hundred have died and we have absolutely no idea what the effects of it will be later in life even if they don't get sick now, so PLEASE SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT 'KIDS DON'T GET IT,' REPUBLICAN ASSHOLES. (American Academy of Pediatrics)

Seriously, please go back and read that Politico. HOW DID THAT MAN GET TO BE A DOCTOR.

Here lies Mss Bannister, 28-year-old third-grade teacher, diagnosed Friday, died on Monday. (WWAY)

Here's science to tell you parents and kids have had it fucking hard this year, nobody tell the AP. SCIENCE! (CIDRAP)

I mean, I was really super duper busy yestertoday, and I didn't see all the news, but I don't think this is right?

What Ana Marie Cox said:

And then some loathsome new avatar for white supremacy would slither forth. If we were lucky, it'd be someone even more grotesque and conventionally uncouth: An audibly farting, lobster-hued, thick-fingered nincompoop with an even longer tie, even more absurd hair, even less capable of constructing a sentence that gets from here to there, free of garbled words and obvious fantasies.


Chad Wolf told your newest DHS whistleblower, Brian Murphy, to shut his fucking yap about Russia because it made President Russian Stooge look bad, like a Russian stooge. (Washington Post)

[Whistleblower complaint]

I know the Lincoln Project is there to do our dirty work, and we libs are all a bit precious about being too fair. HOWEVER. I categorically reject likening anyone, including Lindsey Graham, to a parasite:

[S]tomach-churning images of maggots, animals decaying, and bugs feeding on flesh.

And then there's Senator Lindsay Graham (R-SC). "Some animals can't survive unless they take," says the ad's narrator. "They don't establish natural equilibriums. Some animals are parasitic. They drink the lifeblood of their host, infect whatever they touch and spread like a virus. They're often right under our noses, camouflaged, convincing their hosts they're not harmful at all."

Insisting people are parasites is how you get the Holocaust and Rwanda, and I'm not going to giggle and call it naughty. — Towleroad

Should you buy Josh Powell's book about how he was the only good man at the NRA, it's those other ones who are bloodthirsty hoors?

This is a sad book, and a bad one, and you shouldn't buy it. The thinking in it is poor; the writing is worse. The author "exposes" evils that, if you've been paying even scant attention, you already know. Expect it soon in a Walmart remainder bin near you.

To summarize my argument thus far: No.

Thank you for your service, New York Times.

Hey look! It's social workers instead of police! (Denver Post)

Your mission, should you choose to accept it: Face mask designs! Any designs we like, we shall steal, but we will send you a suite of shizz with your art on it. Because goddamn if I can think of any. Here's templates! You can email me your finished product at rebecca at wonkette dot com. (Heat Press Nation)

Do your Amazon shopping through this link, because reasons.

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Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.


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