Why Your Ritualistic June Lottery Can Bring July Sorrows. Tabs, Wed., June 30, 2021

Tabs gif from your bestie Martini Ambassador!

Maricopa County, Arizona, won't reuse the voting machines that the Cyber Ninjas confiscated for their so-called “audit." The cost to Arizona taxpayers is as yet unknown. (Arizona Central)

The Big Lie's lost cause audit in Arizona has backfired for Republicans. A majority of Arizona voters oppose the audit, according to a poll that also shows President Joe Biden thumping Donald Trump by seven points in a 2024 rematch. Not that poll numbers and even “votes" will matter much with Republican-controlled legislature. (Politico)

Charles Pierce explains why only silly people ever thought Republicans would cooperate with an actual investigation into the January 6 Capitol attack. (Esquire)

A far-right super PAC has taken a break from viciously smearing the Squad and is now attacking any Republican who can't identify Donald Trump's colon in a lineup. Activate obvious gif! (The Daily Beast)


From an article about the Portland, Oregon, heatwave:

The city opened cooling centers to provide relief for people without air conditioning, roads buckled as asphalt cooked under three days of triple-digit temperatures, and reporters were left scrambling to find synonyms for "unprecedented" as record after record was met and then broken.

Yeah, that last one is a true tragedy. Don't worry, guys, it's OK to use “unprecedented" multiple times. There's also no need to look up synonyms for “said." This ain't The New Yorker. (Oregonian)

Lina Hidalgo, the chief executive of Harris County, Texas, is a rising Democratic star in a state that has unfortunately elected Ted Cruz twice. Check out this profile and imagine a better world where Hidalgo could win statewide office. (The New Yorker)

Professional fact checkers pulled a few all-nighters and determined that Senator Cruz was lying when he claimed Joe Biden ran on an “abolish the police" platform. (Washington Post)

President Biden will travel to Surfside, Florida, where a residential building collapsed, killing at least 12 people. He's not expect to hurl paper towels at anyone, just offer some empathy. (CNN)

Arizona Rep. Paul Gosar really likes to hang out with white supremacists. It's as if he is one. (New York Magazine)

Joan Walsh on Nina Turner's campaign to replace Marcia Fudge in the House of Representatives. Please be kind in the comments. (The Nation)

New York City landlords are so desperate for office tenants post-pandemic that they're offering lower rents, snazzy layouts, and fancy new technology, like computers that crash only half as often. One Manhattan office building has a hidden speakeasy! I'd need a few stiff drinks before I'd consider working in a New York office again. I left the city 10 years ago but still have traumatic flashbacks to the morning elevator ride. (New York Times)

Here's some July book recommendations for you. (AV Club)

A new tap room and beer garden is moving into my neighborhood! If you're fancy, you can call it a “biergarten." (Eater)

That's it for June. Now get out of here and make some frosty milkshakes.

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Stephen Robinson

Stephen Robinson is a writer and social kibbitzer based in Portland, Oregon. He writes make believe for Cafe Nordo, an immersive theatre space in Seattle. Once, he wrote a novel called “Mahogany Slade,” which you should read or at least buy. He's also on the board of the Portland Playhouse theatre. His son describes him as a “play typer guy."


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