Big Bird Got Vaxxed, And Ted Cruz, Usual Assholes, Being Usual Assholes About It

Big Bird Got Vaxxed, And Ted Cruz, Usual Assholes, Being Usual Assholes About It

Last year, poor innocent Ted Cruz was deeply traumatized after the Twitter account for the Sesame Street Workshop sent out a tweet for Pride month. "Endless propaganda. This is a taxpayer-funded show targeted at pre-K children. It doesn't need to be talking about sex or sexuality at all," he wrote, referring to a sexually explicit picture featuring Elmo in full bondage gear.

Either that or it was a wholesome picture of all the Sesame Street muppets reaching their hands out to a rainbow heart. One of the two.

In his defense, it is possible he believed that the rainbow heart was a rainbow butt plug. Unlikely, but possible.

Anyway, the Sesame Street Workshop has gone and done it again, deeply upsetting Cruz and other conservatives by allowing Big Bird to tweet out that he got a vaccine — which they are claiming is "government propaganda" directed at children.

Here are just a few comments from the quote tweets.

"They are coming for your kids"

"You aren't even a real person shut the fuck up and let people make their own decisions you stupid idiot."

"Breaking news! Big bird is hospitalized with multiple blood clots and uncontrollable muscle spasms…the hospital is so full of vaxxed patients he has to share a room with the grinch who's heart grew three times it's normal size the day of his shot."

"Time to go #hunting for some big yellow propaganda spewing birds."

"This kind of propaganda is actually evil. Your children are not statistically at risk, and should not be pressured into a brand new treatment. Do Not Comply!"

Clearly, the Right does not believe muppets are entitled to free speech protections. Should Big Bird have checked with Ted Cruz before revealing his vaccination status, in order to avoid doing any inadvertent government propaganda that might go against the wishes of a person who literally works in the government?

Alt-Right mouthpiece and rape apologist Mike Cernovich was particularly upset, first replying "What's the treatment for myocarditis in birds?" as if the risk for myocarditis isn't several times greater with COVID than the vaccines. Despite this, the "His bird heart is going to explode!" rhetoric was one of the more popular responses to the tweet from the Right, even though that is not what myocarditis is. Myocarditis, for the record, is very rare and usually goes away on its own in a matter of days. COVID can wreck you for life.

He also asked, "Isn't it illegal to advertise drugs to children?" We can only imagine the outrage when he finds out about Children's Tylenol.

As Big Bird points out, this is not his first vaccine. He got vaccinated against something in 1972, way back when he was still six years old. As far as we know, no one freaked out about this.

Mr. Rogers, notably, got a vaccine on air.

While the Sesame Street Workshop is not actually "funded by taxpayers" (but rather primarily through donations and licensing) or literally brought to you by the letter B, it is a common occurrence for certain forms of "government propaganda" to be directed at children, particularly as it concerns health. That's not weird. It's just that only recently has "health" become such a partisan issue. Are they equally disturbed by the existence of the Presidential Youth Fitness Program (formerly the Presidential Fitness Test)?

It's also an odd complaint coming from people who believe children should be forced to say the Pledge of Allegiance, with the "Under God" part intact, and flip out over football players kneeling during the national anthem. And let's not let them forget that they were the party of "Freedom Fries."

The Right loves government propaganda and has no problem pushing government propaganda on children, including literally demanding that they be allowed to use public schools and libraries to brainwash kids into believing that America is and has always been without flaw and that racism doesn't exist here. Or even use them to convert children to Christianity through school prayer. All of that is far more insidious than a giant muppet bird getting an FDA-approved vaccine, just like Ted Cruz did.

Do your Amazon shopping through this link, because reasons.

Wonkette is independent and fully funded by readers like you. Click below to tip us!

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)

Robyn Pennacchia

Robyn Pennacchia is a brilliant, fabulously talented and visually stunning angel of a human being, who shrugged off what she is pretty sure would have been a Tony Award-winning career in musical theater in order to write about stuff on the internet. Follow her on Twitter at @RobynElyse


How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)


©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc