The Final Countdown: Enjoy the Heat Before Snowmageddon Returns


It’s time to assess whether you've been doing enough drinking on outdoor patios this summer. Well, HAVE YOU? The three-day-drunk-fest that marks the end of summer is but one month away. Whether your fun comes courtesy ofslave reparations or not, you can have just as lavish a last month of summer as Sasha Obama, right here in the fine District of Columbia.

Look at all these fun things you can do in DC, at least before someone decides that, In These Trying Times, eating pig, watching movies outdoors and listening to music is not what this country needs right now:

  • Jazz in the Garden: There’s no excuse not to go to Jazz in the Garden Fridays during the summer. True, the garden gets unbearably hot. But, in the end, it’s all about you, your friends, and alcohol -- a winning combination. There may be some jazz in there too. The series ends Friday, September 10.
  • Outdoor Movies: Watching a movie outdoors on some sort of green surface, be it turf or actual grass, is What One Does in DC during the summer. Screen on the Green has come and gone, but you can still catch a '90s film in Rosslyn or a film at the U Street Movie Series, which happens to be the only film festival in DC that regularly features black men as leading characters.
  • Corcoran Gallery of Art: Admission to the gallery is FREE on Saturdays through September 4. Looking at art makes you cultured, and looking at art that costs money to look at every other day of the week makes you cultured and savvy. If you prefer your culture with a side of alcohol, check out the Phillips After 5 events, which are on Thursday evenings from 5-8:30PM.
  • Drinking on Patios: Imbibing outside in the gross humidity is so much more fun than drinking inside, so this is something you should do as often as possible before summer ends. Some of the better patios/rooftops to check out include: Beacon Bar and Grill and Local 16 and Eventide and Cantina Marina, Commonwealth and The Gibson.
  • New Restaurants: So many fun new restaurants have opened in DC this summer, and, amazingly, not all of them are lounge-y types that only serve small plates of ethnic food -- well, except for Estadio and Agora and probably 10 other ones that we can’t think of right now. We also welcomed two new beer palaces this summer, Meridian Pint and the Biergarten Haus, both of which are helping put the “up and coming” in what used to be two of DC’s finest crack-laden neighborhoods.
  • Tubing: Nothing says summer like relaxing in an innertube on the ever-so-disgusting Potomac with your friends and random strangers, many of whom fall into the unfortunate category of people who enjoy pounding beers against their head, for fun.
  • Summer Deals: On Fridays, Acadiana is hosting shrimp and crawfish boils ($16/lb for shrimp and $13/lb for crawfish); Potenza is selling a pizza and a pint of Peroni for just $10 during the evenings; Urbana has extended its happy hour until 8PM and is offering $5 plates of goodness, including duck meatballs; and Bourbon Steak has decided that the only way Washingtonians can survive the summer heat is by by paying $7 for a fancy hot dog and a craft beer.
  • Pool Parties: You could slum it by going to one of DC's perfectly fine free community pools, or complete your education in hipster by checking out the very eclectic BYT pool parties on Saturdays at the Capital Skyline Hotel, or the Monday night pool parties at the Donovan House that are hosted by the clothing store Commonwealth.

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)


©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc