The Jimmy Carter Movie Could Be So Much Better

Behave, MelaniePolitico's gossip grunt Anne Schroeder reports today that Jimmy Carter was in town at the MPAA to catch the preview of Jonathan Demme's cinematic blow job to him. And, again, as we said before, we're having a hard time wrapping our heads around the idea of viewing a movie about a book tour (pandemonium ensues when the tip of Jimmy's Sharpie gets mushy!) without falling asleep. Surely Demme could have spiced things up a bit by revisiting some of his past triumphs.

The Oscar-winning director should have spiced things up by including intermittent Zelig-like vignettes of Jimmy recast in scenes from his back catalog. We suggest the following:

* Jeff Daniels doesn't know whether he's coming or going when the daffy ex-president kidnaps him and forces him to accompany him to his high school reunion.

* Incarcerated Jimmy tells Jodie Foster that he can't smell her cunt.

* All his troubles are forgotten when Jimmy falls into a reverie while listening to Mozart.

* An FBI agent falls in love with sultry Mafia widow Jimmy.

* Stern prison matron Carter brutally abuses Barbara Steele.

Shenanigans: Groovy, man [Politico]


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