In today's edition of The New York Times, Ross Douthat dipped his little toes in the water of a grand thought experiment -- that maybe incels, like mass murderer Alek Minassian, kind of have a point and that perhaps we should consider a "redistribution of sex." Just like how people talk about redistributing the wealth and property of the nation and world, except with vaginas.

"[F]irst it brings me to the case of Robin Hanson, a George Mason economist, libertarian and noted brilliant weirdo. Commenting on the recent terrorist violence in Toronto, in which a self-identified “incel” — that is, involuntary celibate — man sought retribution against women and society for denying him the fornication he felt that he deserved, Hanson offered this provocation: If we are concerned about the just distribution of property and money, why do we assume that the desire for some sort of sexual redistribution is inherently ridiculous?

Over the past couple weeks, we've had fellas like Douthat and Hanson (who made it into this weekend's edition of Garbage Men) pondering wee "thought experiments" about how we could get sex to these poor men who are definitely killing people because they are deprived of it. We've had various sites suggesting that being dumped by a woman "fueled" the Golden State Killer's 12 year murder and rape spree. It is almost enough to make you forget that these crimes were actually committed by men! I mean, sure -- they're the ones doing the killing, but whose fault is it, really?

Douthat's suggestion is that we graciously take cues from other "radical thinkers" on how to solve this problem. The answer, he suggests, may lie in sex workers and sex robots.

But I expect the logic of commerce and technology will be consciously harnessed, as already in pornography, to address the unhappiness of incels, be they angry and dangerous or simply depressed and despairing. The left’s increasing zeal to transform prostitution into legalized and regulated “sex work” will have this end implicitly in mind, the libertarian (and general male) fascination with virtual-reality porn and sex robots will increase as those technologies improve — and at a certain point, without anyone formally debating the idea of a right to sex, right-thinking people will simply come to agree that some such right exists, and that it makes sense to look to some combination of changed laws, new technologies and evolved mores to fulfill it.

Ah yes. Why shouldn't our "zeal" for safety, human rights and dignity for sex workers (and all workers!) translate into a benefit for misogynistic potential mass murderers? Either that, or...

But why not go a step further? Over the years, there have been numerous cannibal killers. Jeffrey Dahmer, Albert Fish, Andrei Chikatilo and more. Men driven to kill and eat other human beings. Are we so cold as to not listen to their cries for help? To refuse to provide for them the sweet, sweet human flesh that they so clearly crave?

Perhaps, rather than driving them to go out into the night to kill their dinner, we at least consider a program in which a certain percentage of the population will be required to donate their bodies to cannibals upon their demise. This way, we'd never have to worry about cannibal killers again!

We could even consider making a fake human meat to satiate their desires. From what I have read, human flesh tastes either like veal or pork, so with the technologies available to us today, I'm not sure why we couldn't come up with a decent substitute and simply shape it into a pair of human buttocks. Surely, right-thinking people will all soon agree that cannibals have a right to human flesh that ought not be denied.

Unless, that is, there is actually something seriously wrong with people who kill and eat people other than their palates.

The problem with establishing a "right to sex" or a "right to consume human flesh" is that people have a right, first and foremost, to their own bodily autonomy. This is much different and certainly more personal than wealth or property redistribution. Sex workers also have a right to their own bodies and a right to say no, and -- barring taking away that right -- there cannot ever be a "right to sex."

The idea of "redistributing sex" to these men to get them to not kill women would be considered "negotiating with terrorists" if the terrorists were anyone other than a bunch of angry young mostly white men. The fact is, the vast majority of them have nothing but disdain for sex workers, and absolutely no interest in sex robots other than dreaming about the day when "real" women see that men have chosen sex bots over us and we regret all of our evil ways and beg them to take us back.

What they are mad at is a loss of patriarchal power, and what they are in is a murder cult. They don't long for companionship with women, and they aren't even just looking for some "thing" to stick their shriveled dicks in. They hate women and hold a deep resentment about the fact that they do not get to live in a time and place in which we had little economic choice but to marry them in order to survive. They are angry that the sexual revolution took that away from them. They don't fantasize about normal sex, they openly fantasize about rape as a mode of revenge against us -- when they aren't fantasizing about acid attacks. They fantasize about shaming women. And you can't shame a sex robot.

There's a desire, it seems, to see these men as poor little Duckies who, try as they might, just can't win over the Molly Ringwald of their dreams. Or even to see them as social radicals engaging in direct action in order to achieve justice for a cause. But they're not. These are not just lonely people we should feel bad for and sympathize with. I have been covering them for years. Trust me, they are violent and they are dangerous and they are deluded. They have created their own reality in what can only be described as a folie à cent mille.

Instead of talking about a "right to sex" or a redistribution of vaginas, we need to be talking about the way we, as a culture, teach men that they are entitled to romantic attention to women. We need to be figuring out ways to deal with online radicalization, and law enforcement needs to be taking the threats that these men make against women -- publicly and on message boards everyone can see -- as seriously as we would if they were any other organized group of people routinely plotting violence on the internet.

You can't solve violent misogyny by granting "access to sex" any more than you "solve" Nazis by taking rights away from people of color, or "solve" cannibalistic serial killers by giving them access to human flesh. Women's bodies are not your thought experiment.

And on that note, it's your OPEN THREAD.

[The New York Times]

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Robyn Pennacchia

Robyn Pennacchia is a brilliant, fabulously talented and visually stunning angel of a human being, who shrugged off what she is pretty sure would have been a Tony Award-winning career in musical theater in order to write about stuff on the internet. Previously, she was a Senior Staff Writer at Death & Taxes, and Assistant Editor at The Frisky (RIP). Currently, she writes for Wonkette, Friendly Atheist, Quartz and other sites. Follow her on Twitter at @RobynElyse

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Republicans are devouring each other's carcasses, and we are here for it! Especially when one of those Republicans is King Kris of the Kansas Votefucker Klan ... errr, Clan! It's been a week since Kansans cast their votes in the gubernatorial primary, and the GOP looks to be rolling up its sleeves for a slugfest.

As we type, Kobach leads by 298 votes out of more than 314,000 cast -- a whopping 0.00095 percent, if you round up! The Kansas GOP begged Donald Trump to stay out of the race and leave the field clear for sitting governor Jeff Colyer, who took over when Sam Brownback wandered off to bring Jesus to the Hottentots on behalf of the US government. Safe bet that Colyer would be gearing up for the general election now if President Twitterthumbs hadn't flapped his yap. So thanks for that, Donny!

No, really, THANKS!

Remember the hanging chad debacle in Florida? Now picture it in a landlocked state with more cows than people. It's like fantasy island for Devin Nunes, ALLEGEDLY.

Oh, but we are to kid!

After first insisting he wasn't going to recuse from the counting, Secretary of State Kris Kobach (one and the same!) wrote Colyer a fabulously bitchy letter agreeing to hand off the tabulation to his deputy, Eric Rucker. Colyer had made the shocking suggestion that Kobach delegate responsibility to the Kansas attorney general, rather than his own political appointee, and Kobach was stretched out on the settee with a fit of the vapors at the gross impropriety of it all!

I will not breach the public trust and arbitrarily assign my responsibilities to another office that is not granted such authority by the laws of Kansas.

After several anguished paragraphs, Kobach closed by remonstrating that Colyer was betraying his office by destroying the faith of Kansans in the sacred integrity of their electoral process.

As governor of Kansas, your unrestrained rhetoric has the potential to undermine the public's confidence in the election process. May I suggest that you trust the people of Kansas have made the right decision at the polls and that our election officials will properly determine the result as they do in every election.

Said the guy whose entire adult life has been dedicated to whipping up panic about millions of imaginary illegal alien voters.

So now these two princes can kick the crap out of each other WITH VOTES, specifically, provisional ballots cast by unaffiliated voters under the supervision of poorly trained poll workers. Kansas holds closed primaries, meaning only registered Republicans can vote to select the GOP candidate, BUT an unaffiliated voter can cast a vote by checking a box identifying as a Democrat or a Republican at the polling place. This was news to some poll workers, who mistakenly directed over one thousand unaffiliated voters to use provisional ballots without checking the box indicating party preference. Whoops!

So, will those provisional ballots be counted based on voter intent? Or tossed based on strict interpretation of the statute? And does Kansas law mandate tossing mail-in ballots that arrive without a postmark on Wednesday, since there's no forensic proof that they were mailed before midnight on Tuesday? And how disgusted will the Kansas electorate be when one of these assholes emerges from the melée holding the other one's scalp? And how many millions of dollars are going to be spent on litigating the Republican primary while this nice lady Laura Kelly, the Democratic minority whip of the Kansas Senate, is out campaigning for November?

Even before this debacle, Kobach looked significantly weaker against Kelly than Colyer, with self-funded Libertarian Jeff Orman threatening to throw a wrench in the works. The Wichita Eagle reports on a Remington Research Poll conducted in July:

In a Kelly-Orman-Kobach race, the poll puts Kelly and Kobach effectively in a dead heat — 36 percent for Kelly and 35 percent for Kobach, with Kelly's lead within the margin of error. Orman has 12 percent.

Colyer leads in a three-way race with Kelly and Orman, according to the poll. In that scenario, Colyer receives 38 percent of the vote, while Kelly gets 28 percent and Orman receives 10 percent.

Which is ONE POLL, in a deeply red state, but ... Kobach is a crap candidate who's likely to emerge from this fight with two black eyes and a pissed off base. If there's anyone who can blow this election, it's Kris Kobach.

Keep fighting, Kris! You can do it! (And now we need a shower.)

And YOU need an OPEN THREAD!

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[Kobach letter / Wichita Eagle / Mother Jones / Kansas City Star]

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While most people spent this weekend telling Nazi punks to fuck off, a couple 11-year-olds were in Las Vegas hacking into voting machines. Why? BECAUSE IT'S FUN!

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