This House is Clean

We don't know how to tell you this, but it's been kind of a non-suck week here at Wonkette HQ, and our feelings don't know what to do with that. We wrote two posts (now threeeee? someone call a doctor! something ain't right!), which I am pretty sure is illegal. We got new stickers in and they made us happy and also money. (Please buy more.) And thanks to, not kidding, the GOP Tax Cut for Rich Fuckwads, we got a brand shiny spanky did I mention shiny and also spanky solar array! The inspector came out yesterday, said, "SHORE, YUP, turn it on!" and then an hour later it started to rain.

REGARDLESS, depending on where you live (sorry Oklahoma), I think if you're able that you should too.

Did I say thanks to the GOP Tax Cut for Rich Fuckwads? I did. Somewhere on one of the hand-scrawled addenda as Paul Ryan was trying desperately to reduce the deficit lol I am #jokes, they put back in an alternative energy tax credit that had sunsetted in 2016. (And yes, it's the only good thing they did.) That's right: The feds will pay you back 30 percent of what you spend on solar, geothermal, or wind this year (then the credit starts dropping till it's only 10 percent in 2022, so do it now if you can!), even though Trump says windmills cause wind cancer, and his uncle was an MIT, so he knows science pretty terrific.

Uncle Sugar will be picking up $6000 out of $18k, the state of Montana's throwing in for a grand, and Governor Steve Bullock, bless his heart, will loan us the total cost at an interest rate that's less than our mortgage. Google around, see what your state's got (except Oklahoma). Colorado's got loans for 2.75 percent!

Isn't it really hard to get solar? Nah, you're on the internet. Find two providers near you, ask them both for a proposal, and go with the guy who's been doing it since the '70s and has passed on the business to the younger guys and the smiling no-makeup mid-30s Amazon women climbing up on your roof. They'll get you your permits, deal with the utility, PROBABLY make sure it's nice and symmetrical so it sets the tone for the neighborhood, get the inspectors out to sign off on it, and be on their way after a hug. And you -- if you never take your chargers out the wall, and you've got a household of four who are always to home, and grow lights and a heater in the garage FOR TOMATO STARTERS, REALLY, NOT POT in February and March, and you just get actually sick to your stomach with the amount of energy you're wasting (say, hypothetically, you're using FOUR TIMES THE AVERAGE FOR A HOUSEHOLD IN MONTANA) -- there really isn't a better time than now.

Unless you want to wait for Jay Inslee to pick up the whole tab. Which could happen! But that's gonna take a while.

Also: Get some bees. And some clover. And a puppy or four. And to tie it all together look at our stickers. They're a nice thick ... vinyl I think? and will last on your car TOGETHER IN HARMONY just swell.

Also too forever IMPEACH. (Tiny and also not for your bumper.)


Now tell us something nice, it's your OPEN THREAD!

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Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.


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