We'll spend the weekend wishing we had a $2.5 million book deal -- congrats, Valerie! -- and disappointment that the new CIA director is probably going to be Gen. Michael V. Hayden (rather than the uber-hot Fran Townsend). But here are a few things that you can do on this glorious spring weekend:

* Watch a nation descend into Fascism. It's just a play, people, just a play. [Rorschach Theatre via DCeiver]

* Get drunk on Bourbon and mint juleps. Oh, and watch the Kentucky Derby, too. [DCist]

* Enjoy the soulful stylings of Anthony Hamilton. [Free Ride]

* Pay $15 for the privilege of eating "Rocky Mountain Oysters." [DCist]


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