Tommy Thompson Fever: Catch It!

Former guy-we-barely-remember Tommy "Tommy Gun" Thompson is running for president!


He filed his papers today, as you can see by this grainy faxed image. A Wonkette operative says, "For the 'who cares' file. Still time to get that 'ThompsonForPresident' domain name!"

Thompson was governor of Wisconsin, where he grew mutant transgendered deer, and then Bush made him the Health and Human Services secretary, where he told a $150 billion lie about the new Medicare scheme and engaged in regular conflicts of interest that profited his various companies and investments. In 2004, he quit to concentrate on putting radio-computer chips in people's skin so the government can control them or even kill them at will.

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