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Time to fire up that shredder, kids! Poppy Trump has invoked executive privilege over the entire Mueller Report, so now we have to delete poor Evan's eight-million-word liveblog. DOH! Bill Barr followed through on his threat to ground the House and send it to bed without its 448-page bedtime story if Chairman Jerry Nadler proceeded this morning with a Judiciary Committee vote to hold the Attorney General in contempt of Congress. Which he did. Yesterday, Barr was willing to show a whole 12 of the 41 members of the Committee a less-redacted report, as long as they promised never to talk about it with anyone on the House Intel Committee. But now that is ILLEGAL because the entirety of the report -- including the 90 percent that has already been published unredacted -- is covered under a warm, fluffy blanket of privilege.


Assistant Attorney General Stephen Boyd wrote to Nadler this morning:

We are disappointed that you have rejected the Department of Justice's request to delay the vote of the Committee on the Judiciary on a contempt finding against the Attorney General this morning. By doing so, you have terminated our ongoing negotiations and abandoned the accommodation process with respect to your April 18, 2019 subpoena of confidential Department of Justice materials related to the investigation conducted by Special Counsel Robert Mueller, III.

Okay, buddy. Boyd can posture for the court all he likes as to who walked away from the table first, but he's still sending a letter claiming that several hundred pages which the White House agreed to publish are now secret because Donald Trump waved his magic privilege wand.

Unfortunately, rather than allowing the negotiations to continue, you scheduled an unnecessary contempt vote, which you refused to postpone to allow additional time for compromise.

Accordingly, this is to advise you that the President has asserted executive privilege over the entirety of the subpoenaed materials. As I indicated in my letter to you last night, this protective assertion of executive privilege ensures the President's ability to make a final decision whether to assert privilege following a full review of these materials.

Meanwhile, back at the Judiciary Committee, the initial vote on the markup for the Barr contempt citation was 22-12 in favor. Womp womp. Looks like Bill Barr's threat to withhold information he'd already acknowledged the members had a right to see might have backfired.

Sometimes heroes wear capes. Sometimes they're a 5-foot-4 Jewish grandfather from Brooklyn with a penchant for sweater vests. It's a weird world.

Speaking of weird, get a load of Congressman HeeHaw, who knows that HILLARY IS THE REAL COLLUSION.

PEW PEW! Ranking Member Doug Collins makes words real good like. Republican Steve Chabot is also sure that Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama were making secret love babies with Vladimir Putin and Christopher Steele, and Bill Barr is just about to find out about it.

GOP Rep. Debbie Lesko excoriated the Democrats for engaging in week after week of "political theater" -- guess she didn't get the memo that the GOP looooves the theatah, they just want Hillary Clinton on the marquee. Jim Jordan cited all the career FBI officials Trump fired as evidence of a DEEP STATE conspiracy. And Matt Gaetz suggested that Nadler could read the "less redacted" version of the report out on the floor of the House instead of going after Bill Barr if he really cared about justice. Which is ... ummm. They're still yammering, but we're going to cut them off. Especially you, Matt!

Okay, just one more.

YUP. We probably shouldn't have elected the worst person in America as president. Thanks, electoral college!

LOCK THEM UP.

[Boyd Letter Nadler]

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Five Dollar Feminist

Your FDF lives in Baltimore under an assumed identity as an upstanding member of the PTA. Shhh, don't tell anyone she makes swears on the internet!

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Photo by Wonkette operative 'Zippy W. Spincycle'

Last week, Yr Dok Zoom talked a little bit about his damn dissertation, which looked at "Wabbit Literacy," the weird thing where we sometimes learn about the world from parodies and jokes long before we ever encounter the original stuff -- like learning about opera from cartoons. More than one person in the comments (which Wonkette does not allow and yet, like life, you find a way) mentioned they were disappointed, as kids, to learn that while roadrunners are real birds, the actual critter looks nothing like this:

Which is not to say that real roadrunners are the least bit disappointing, as animals go, because they're freaking incredible. Yes, even if they don't actually leave lines of flame down the center line of desert highways and go "Meep! Meep!" But they can sprint up to 20 miles per hour, which is faster than you, albeit slower than a real coyote's top speed. Also, yes, real coyotes are among the predators what eat roadrunners, which is why the wily birds adopted the evolutionary strategy of running right through fake tunnels coyotes paint on the sides of mountains.

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Once upon a time... about ten years ago, a group of entirely ridiculous men burst onto the scene wearing stupid hats and telling men that wearing stupid hats and telling men that walking up to women in bars and insulting ("negging") them would get them laid. This did not last long, as women also had televisions and computers and were completely aware of these tricks as well, so when some ass came up to us in a bar and said "Hey, nice nails, are they real?" we would laugh and laugh and loudly announce "Oh my god, this guy just tried to neg me! Can you believe that shit? HEY EVERYONE, THIS GUY JUST TRIED TO NEG ME!" and then refer to him as "Mystery" the whole night.

Most of the men who tried that shit only did so a few times before realizing that it wasn't going to work, and thus moved on to other things. Perhaps things that did not involve furry hats and coming off as a huge creep. We may never know, because I would assume that those who tried it are now extremely embarrassed and would never, ever admit to this to us.

Still, there were a few men willing to eat that shit up, as well as some grifters willing to take advantage of that. Said grifters tended to be extremely misogynistic and seemed more like they were teaching men how to be as despised by women as they were than teaching them how to actually be liked by women.

Some of them, like Roosh V, a creepy weirdo who actually does live in his mom's basement, actively encouraged men to rape women who were intoxicated to the point of being obviously unable to consent.

However, even that branch of the PUA tree is wilting away. Many "self-help" style PUA forums like Nextasf and RSDnation are shutting down or have already shut down. In March, Chateau Heartiste, a batshit crazy PUA turned White Nationalist/Alt-Right blog was shut down by Wordpress. This week, rape advocate Roosh V (whom you may recall once called yours truly a "Wonkette typist/clown face, would not bang") announced that he was renouncing his PUA ways and devoting himself to Jesus. He explained to the forum he manages that he would no longer be allowing anyone to discuss premarital "fornication."

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