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Good morning, it is September 11, 2018. Kids who were born on this day in 2001 are high school seniors this year, can you believe it? #YouAreOld.

If you are of a certain age (you know, like "old") you remember exactly where you were on 9/11. And regardless of what kinds of emotions the day brings now, 17 years on, there's a certain reverence to this day, and a good bit of storytelling. In times like these, as we remember how America came together and decided to #NeverForget -- first by bombing the appropriate country and then, a few months later, bombing a completely inappropriate country based on "Bush wanted to" -- it's nice to know we have a president who understands the solemn nature of this anniversary, who brings a certain gravitas to the ...


QUIT YOUR JOB, MOTHERFUCKER.

Seriously, that was his first tweet of the day, because President Cloud Yeller can't be bothered for five fucking seconds to be an adult who doesn't make everything about his goddamned whining.

The president (for however much longer that lasts) did manage to follow up with a 9/11-related retweet from Dan Scavino, before going back to whining about whatever conspiracy theories "Fox & Friends" was vomiting into his dumb baby mouth:

True fact, dude. The world is indeed watching, and they're more horrified than Americans are that this gutter dimwit baby is president of the United States.

Whine more:

NBC News has a fascinating and sobering report this morning about how the long-term health effects on 9/11 first responders are multiplying at such a rate that ultimately more people might die of 9/11-related illnesses than perished in the attack itself. That would be a very interesting thing for a Twitter-addicted American president to tweet out on this day, don't you think? But nah, let's just whine about the Justice Department a whole bunch.

Ooh! Wait, though! Donald Trump remembered a thing about 9/11 that's totally about him! No, it's not his recurring lie that he saw LITERAL GABILLIONS of Muslims dancing in the streets of New Jersey as the towers fell, and no it's not his self-fellating lie that once Osama bin Laden's work was done, that made Trump's buildings the tallest in New York. This is about his very smart lawyer Rudy Giuliani, whose brain works every bit as well as it did on that Indian summer day in 2001 you bet:

Rudy Giuliani, everyone!

Show us how good you #math, Mister President:

Yep, you got it.

Trump, according to his Twitter, is heading off to do some 9/11 memorial thing in Shanksville, PA, so we guess that's the literal least he could do.

Hey, remember that time Trump said he gave CBS's "Face The Nation" better ratings than they had gotten since 9/11?

Ooh, ooh, and also, hey remember how Trump occasionally seems to wistfully wish for his very own Reichstag Fire 9/11, so that people will rally around Dear Leader, like Americans did for George W. Bush?

The day is still young. Get ready for that fuckhead to embarrass us a lot more as the day goes on.

#NeverForget

UPDATE: Well, he's arrived in Shanksville.

The embarrassment continues.

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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Hello! Here a beautiful open thread for you to not comment all over, so that you don't not comment all over Dok's book club post.

I was gonna drop my Nonnie's recipe for Easter bread in here, but apparently it has to proof overnight and is also for approximately 87,000 people, so not much of a point to that! (Though here it is if you really want it. She doesn't do the egg thing, but if you want, you can put some dyed raw eggs in the braided dough before you bake. And you can add sprinkles, and anise if you're gross and like gross things) I was gonna try and make it myself last night, but have instead opted to just make waffles. Waffles are FINE.

So instead, I shall just leave you with this absolutely terrifying version of The Velveteen Rabbit starring Marie Osmond as said velveteen rabbit. Coincidentally, Marie Osmond is also Nonnie's 2nd arch-nemesis, after Rachel Ray (Rachel Ray because she doesn't pull her hair back when she cooks, and Marie for reasons I'm not entirely clear on but which I believe are related to a Weight Watchers commercial).

THE VELVETEEN RABBIT starring Marie Osmond - full length feature youtu.be


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'Unemployed men queued outside a depression soup kitchen opened in Chicago by Al Capone' -- National Archives

Happy Day Before Half-Priced Easter Chocolate Day, Wonkers! Time to wrap up our Wonkette Book Club discussion of Winter War: Hoover, Roosevelt, and the First Clash Over the New Deal, by Erich Rauchway, a historian at UC-Davis. We're increasingly convinced the book might have just as well been titled Herbert Hoover: Christ, What An Asshole! As ever, even if you haven't finished the reading, jump in anyway -- there won't be a test!

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