Trump Plans Streaming Network To Separate MAGA Rubes From Fox. And Their Money.

So what does Donald Trump plan to do when he finishes salting the earth and persuading half the electorate that Democrats stole the White House from him? Not real work, that's for damn sure! Even if he hadn't wrecked his brand with the only people rich enough to stay in hotels, then wrecked the economy by allowing COVID-19 to go unchecked, the man is far too lazy to go back to running the Trump Organization.

Axios reports that "President Trump has told friends he wants to start a digital media company to clobber Fox News and undermine the conservative-friendly network." See, he's real mad that Fox called Arizona for Biden on election night, and even though they were right and he's going to lose Arizona, it's the network's fault that he lost the election. And now they have to die!

Yeah, that tracks. Sheer spite and the opportunity to hurl insults is the only thing that gets the president out of bed in the morning, so Trump is dedicating himself to taking out the network that carried him on its back for the past six years.

"He plans to wreck Fox. No doubt about it," a source told Axios, adding that, "He's going to spend a lot of time slamming Fox" at upcoming rallies to spread lies about vote fraud and solidify his base.

President Lazyass thought about starting an IRL television channel, but "getting carried on cable systems would be expensive and time-consuming." (Read: seemed too much like work.) So instead he's going to set up his own streaming platform to compete with Fox Nation, which charges users $5.99/month for primo content, like Bible study with Ainsley Earhardt and extended rants by Tomi Lahren.

And luckily he's been able to use donor dollars to amass the biggest list of marks customers in history. That "Death Star" Brad Parscale constructed may not have been able to win an election, but it did generate a list of hundreds of thousands of Americans who'll put up with a dozen texts a day begging for money without taking out a restraining order. And now, assuming Trump actually follows through — and that's a big IF, see also Sarah Palin Tee Vee — Trump will spin that list into cash money by siphoning off those suckerbux for MAGA teevee.

Toward that end, Trump has been trashing Fox for months.

And he's banging that drum hard this morning.

He's also talked up OANN and Newsmax as they fanned the flames of Rudy Giuliani's anti-Biden hoaxes, giving that nutbag OANN reporter Chanel Rion space to spew inanities about racist Chinese food in the White House press briefings. Presumably, he'll flip on them, too, if and when he gets a competitor platform up and running and teaches Ma 'n' Pa Deplorable to work a Fire Stick.

Because the scorpion will always sting the frog as soon as he gets across the water. It's in his nature. And the opposite bank is just 69 days away.


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Liz Dye

Liz Dye lives in Baltimore with her wonderful husband and a houseful of teenagers. When she isn't being mad about a thing on the internet, she's hiding in plain sight in the carpool line. She's the one wearing yoga pants glaring at her phone.


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