Trump Sends Warmest Regards To Accused Child Rape Ringleader Ghislaine Maxwell

Donald Trump did a coronavirus briefing Tuesday, his first in however many months, because he in his infinite wisdom thinks his shit poll numbers will turn around if we see more of him. It went ... okay? Obviously grading on a curve for "okay" because Donald Trump is fundamentally incapable of being acceptable as a human being for even five seconds of his godforsaken life?

He read his prepared statement pretty well, he appeared to only tell lies that were pre-planned, he said masks are fine, he has no problems with masks. He showed everybody how he carries his mask in his pocket! (This may be how the president was taught to use condoms too.)

He called COVID-19 the "China virus" incessantly, because he's racist. He said he does NOT take more than one coronavirus test per day, so take that, Kayleigh McEnany, you LIE-IDIOT. He bragged about closing the border to China, which happened after the virus was already in the United States. He said coronavirus would get worse before it gets better, and he just hates that, but he reaffirmed that at some point it's just going to disappear, at which point he will have been right the whole time about how it's going to just disappear.

You know, same old shit.

To be honest, it was like he had popped a very fresh Adderall, timed perfectly so that he'd come across almost like a normal, functioning person. Almost. He never comes across as actually normal, because of how he is so broken and stupid.

Oh yeah, and he really wishes accused child rape trafficking ringleader Ghislaine Maxwell the best.

The question was about whether Ghislaine Maxwell is going to turn in powerful men. Trump's answer was, "I wish her well, frankly." He said he's "met her numerous times over the years," because he guesses "they" lived in Palm Beach just like he did, and then he wished her well again. Because that's a normal thing to say twice about a woman accused of running a child sex trafficking ring that you've been in pictures with a bunch of times, because of how you "met her numerous times over the years."

So that was weird.

If you read between the lines, it was almost like a vague mob threat. Or maybe he's begging her to stay quiet about SOMETHING, and trying to communicate that maybe she might get Roger Stoned if she is very nice and doesn't squeal, not that we can imagine what she could possibly tell the authorities about such a saint as Donald Trump.

Whatever it is, we are guessing Maxwell got the message. Or somebody who was supposed to get the message got the message. Whatever message that is supposed to be.


We are sure QAnon will 'splain us how this is all part of the code and the plan. You betcha.

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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