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Trump's Cabinet Brings The Circus To Washington. Wonkagenda for January 10, 2017
Morning, Wonkers! We've got a really big day today, and we're going to try to get to as much as possible. Here's some of the things we may be talking about today!
- President Obama will give a farewell speech in Chicago tonight to an expected crowd of 14,000 people. It's described as a rallying cry to action, possibly because there's going to be so much action in the opposite direction. Sigh
- The Senate will hold confirmation hearings for three of Donald Trump's cabinet nominees today, despite incomplete investigations from the Office of Government Ethics and background checks from the FBI.
- Jeff Sessions is expected to be grilled by his colleagues because of his lack of support for civil rights, minorities, women, LGBT, the disabled, as well as blocking criminal justice reforms. Even Senator Corey Booker will testify against Sessions in a historic first.
- As Rex Tillerson prepares for his own confirmation hearing by crafting clever answers for why he's best friends with Vladimir Putin and Donald Trump, ExxonMobil is defending its business dealings with Iran, Syria, and Sudan under Rex Tillerson by blaming it all on their evil, mustachioed Euro-trash twin who is totally not American (and also really poor).
- The Senate has postponed the confirmation hearing for Betsy DeVos after Democrats started yelling about all the money she's hiding from a prominent career screwing over public schools in Michigan.
- In his continuing quest to be a bigger brainless jerkoff than Ted Cruz, Jason Chaffetz wants to block D.C.'s new assisted suicide law by threatening to relocate government agencies outside of D.C., as well as dragging the body of Hillary Clinton's emails through the dirt. This fuckin' guy...
- Senate Democrats held a talk-a-thon to save Obamacare last night, while it began to look like the Republican plan to kill off the Affordable Care Act could be in trouble, thanks to a handful of R's who think stripping health care from tens of millions of people could turn out to be unpopular at the ballot box.
- Trump's business has pulled out of a $250 million project in Georgia (the country, not the state) as part of a general "house cleaning" measures, and certainly NOT because of mounting conflicts of interest.
- The FBI has been paying computer repair technicians at a big box retailer for tip-offs on child porn, prompting a legal conundrum between privacy advocates, law enforcement, and creepy pedos who nonetheless have "Constitutional rights." No cheese pizza here!
- A classified website has shuttered its sexy adult fun times section ahead of a Senate panel report that is said to detail a not-so-secret prostitution scheme. No cheese pizza here either!
- A Pentagon report says it's not sure it could stop a North Korean ICBM aimed at the West Coast since American anti-missile systems have a seriously hit-or-miss track record. North Korea's ballistic missiles may or may not work so hot in the first place, so...good?
- Fox News has settled a sexual harassment suit against Bill O'Reilly but don't tell anyone because it's supposed to be a secret.
- And here's your morning Nice Time, meerkats playing Jenga!!