With all of Donald Trump's xenophobic racist huffing and puffing about border walls and Mexican rapists and marauding caravans, would you have ever imagined that he employed undocumented workers at his trash palaces? (Yes. One million times yes.)

The New York Times published a hell of a story today, in which Victorina Morales, a housekeeper at Trump's Bedminster resort in New Jersey, and who is undocumented, is speaking out even though she knows full well she will probably lose her job and maybe even get deported for doing so. (NYT notes that Morales has applied for asylum, so Trump maybe will put her in a baby jail.) She's hurt and freaked out by Trump's anti-immigrant rhetoric, and she's being very brave telling her story like this. God bless her.

Ms. Morales said she has been hurt by Mr. Trump's public comments since he became president, including equating Latin American immigrants with violent criminals. It was that, she said, along with abusive comments from a supervisor at work about her intelligence and immigration status, that made her feel that she could no longer keep silent.

"We are tired of the abuse, the insults, the way he talks about us when he knows that we are here helping him make money," she said. "We sweat it out to attend to his every need and have to put up with his humiliation."


This is a tragic story that has funny parts, so we will try to tell you some of both. Morales is from Guatemala, and she's worked at Bedminster since 2013. The Times reports that she's so damn good at her job that the White House Communications Agency gave her a special certificate recognizing her service.

She came to America illegally in 1999, and her former coworker Sandra Diaz did too. They say that if you walked around Bedminster saying "PAPERS PLEASE" you wouldn't get very many papers, at least not real ones.

Morales has worked up close and personal with Trump, including while he has been president, dusting the sconces and whatnot while he beaches his svelte body on the furniture and plays on Twitter. She says one time, before he was president, he dusted part of a window for her because she was too short to reach it. After he was done, he was even nice to her:

Mr. Trump then asked Ms. Morales her name and where she was from, she recalled. "I said, 'I am from Guatemala.' He said, 'Guatemalans are hard-working people.'" The president then reached into his pocket and handed her a $50 bill.


Another time, he pulled a super creeper move and made her watch while he rubbed his tiny stub finger through an area she had already cleaned. Satisfied, he gave her a big tip that time too. Fuckin' weirdo.

Here is what Ms. Morales has done for Trump, while cleaning his residence at the resort and washing his unmentionables:

She said she washed and ironed Mr. Trump's white boxers, golf shirts and khaki trousers, as well as his sheets and towels.

Ew, you just knew he wore big giant stinky pee-stained white old man boxers, didn't you?

Mr. Trump had an outburst over some orange stains on the collar of his white golf shirt, which Ms. Diaz described as stubborn remnants of his makeup, which she had difficulty removing.

That's right, THAT NASTY ORANGE SHIT ON HIS FACE IS MAKE-UP. And he gets it on his ugly shirts and his ugly panties and probably all over the sconces too.

How did Ms. Morales get hired in the first place? She used fake papers. And when Trump became president and everybody was like "Uh oh, better start pretending like we've been doing this by the book the whole entire time" and employees were encouraged to get real papers? They bought updated fake papers. Why? According to Ms. Morales, that's what her supervisor told her to do.

Reached for comment about how Trump employs all kinds of undocumented immigrants while being the most white supremacist president ever, the Trump Organization said "Nuh uh." (Paraphrase.) The White House didn't even say that much.

As we noted above, Morales and former Bedminster employee Diaz are speaking out because they and other immigrant employees of Trump's property are horrified by how Trump speaks of them, and how they feel he's encouraging others to do the same. Morales mentions another supervisor who "frequently made remarks about the employees' vulnerable legal status when critiquing their work, she said, sometimes calling them 'stupid illegal immigrants' with less intelligence than a dog." How classy.

Morales also says there is zero fucking chance in hell Donald Trump has been blissfully unaware of her undocumented status, or that of her fellow employees. She probably said, "OH COME THE FUCK ON," but the New York Times didn't write that and we don't know how to type it in Spanish, so ...

Anyway, GO READ THE WHOLE THING, as they say on the internet.

And say your thoughts 'n' prayers for Ms. Morales, that the president of the United States doesn't deport this lovely woman who's served him so well for so many years, just because he's mad everybody knows about his Makeup McUnderpants now.

Diaz has legal residency now, so she's probably cool, but say thoughts 'n' prayers for her too.

We have now made you sad, so it is time for your OPEN THREAD!

[New York Times]

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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The producers of your favorite live-action Jack Chick pamphlet, "God's Not Dead" -- you know, the one where the Hercules dude plays an evil philosophy professor who tells all of his students on the first day that they are no longer allowed to believe in god? As all secular professors do? -- have come out with a thrilling new movie, all about how abortion is bad or whatever.

The movie tells the "true" story of Abby Johnson, a former Planned Parenthood clinic worker turned professional anti-choicer. Johnson has been a darling of the forced birth circuit ever since she made up ridiculous and provably false reasons for quitting the Planned Parenthood that was about to fire her for being bad at her job.

Basically, she claims that Planned Parenthood was pushing her to make more abortions happen so they could reel in more dough, and also that she witnessed (for the first time ever!) an ultrasound-guided abortion and saw the baby move from the light and then immediately realized that what she was doing was wrong.

The thing is, however -- no ultrasound-guided abortions were performed on the day she said it happened, and the only reason there was an uptick in abortions at her clinic was because they started offering the abortion pill on a daily basis (and had previously only been performing surgical abortions every other Saturday).

As you may have guessed, the movie does not address any of these things. It also looks very, very bad.

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Ever since Ruth Bader Ginsburg successfully underwent surgery for lung cancer, conservative sites and message boards have been trafficking in a ridiculous theory that she is actually dead and that there is some kind of Weekend at Bernie's-esque conspiracy to pretend she is still alive.

Now, one would think that her recent public appearance at a concert held in her honor would have put this to rest. Alas, it did not. Rather, the "researchers" (as they hilariously call themselves) determined that the concert was actually her funeral.

No. Really. That was a thing.

I admit that I gave this a lot more thought than I should have. Like, how did they think this would go? How long did they imagine this would go on for? Why would they risk having a full on funeral concert, open to the press? Wouldn't they just have not bothered to have a funeral at all? And what did these people think was going to happen when it was announced that she died for real? Or did they think that we were going to pretend that she is immortal and thus never announce her death? It's so confusing!

Being very up to date on the "RBG is secretly dead!" nonsense, I was very curious about which way the "anons" would go with this when they announced her return to work on Friday. They did not disappoint!

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