Virginia Contemplates New Dollar, Porkbelly Futures Skyrocket

News

Wonkette

February 02, 2011 05:07 PM

The Virginia state legislature is preparing to switch from the U.S. dollar to some sort of nu-currency—salted hams, probably. [WND]

Welfare queen Jimmy Carter is living large off of YOUR tax money! Be angry! [Washington Times]

Marriage-rape advocate and anti-feminist Phyllis Schlafly says Americans must rise up against the activist judges who would allow gays the right to marriage-rape. [Eagle Forum]

North Dakota is proposing a bill which would require all divorcing couples to wait one-year and go through counseling. Enjoy living with your emotionally-abusive husbands, ladies! [WDAY]

If you feed your child aspartame, they will die of brain cancer at age 8 due to a magic, deadly bacteria. This is how science works! [Go Beyond Organic]

march against family separation keeping families together moveon.org aclu moms rising june 30 march families belong together ethnic cleansing racism race baiting anti-immigrant racism xenophobia daca march

Let's Get Out And Make Some Noise!

June 30th, in DC and wherever you are!

Post-Racial America

Lace up your sneakers, Wonkers! Time to hit the streets. MoveOn, the ACLU, MomsRising and all your favorite dirty leftists are getting together for a yuuuuuuuuge march to show that WE ARE A NATION OF DECENT FUCKING HUMAN BEINGS WHO DON'T KIDNAP BABIES. And your Wonkette will be there!

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Rudy Giuliani Full Of Shit, According To Noted Legal Scholar Rudy Giuliani

THE FUCK YOU SAY.

News

Rudy Giuliani, flapping his loose yap to Politico on Monday:

President Donald Trump's attorney Rudy Giuliani said on Monday that he was actually just bluffing last week when he called for Justice Department leaders to suspend special counsel Robert Mueller's investigation within 24 hours.

"I didn't think it would," Giuliani told POLITICO with a laugh when asked about the Mueller inquiry's still being very much an active investigation. "But I still think it should be." [...]

That's what I'm supposed to do," Giuliani explained on Monday. "What am I supposed to say? That they should investigate him forever? Sorry, I'm not a sucker."

Cool, that is just Rudy Giuliani admitting he's full of shit and words and more shit and more words (and also a noun, a verb and 9/11). We are guessing therefore that Giuliani, who is a lawyer, would legally advise us to continue assuming we should take his every oral ejaculation with a gi-normous grain of FULL OF SHIT.

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