Wait, Is Putin Getting Paid During The Trump Shutdown? THE F*CK?

We had been wondering how GOP Senator Richard Burr was going to be in this era of divided government. He's the head of the Senate Intelligence Committee, and during the first two years of the Trump presidency, he seemed to take pride in the fact that the Senate was the All Growned Up body of Congress, and that his intelligence committee wasn't running around mouthfucking cows on the White House lawn like Devin Nunes's House Intelligence Committee. Burr seemed to care about doing a real investigation into Russian interference in the 2016 election, and despite his status as a Republican, he seemed to be willing to accept it if that investigation led him directly up Donald Trump's butt.

Well, today we have our answer about how Burr's going to be, and it's that he's definitely ended up inside Trump's ass, but he's apparently there to take a nice nap, and not to look for Russians. First he voted to un-sanction Russian oligarch Oleg Deripaska's companies, because after all, Russia has been very good and who is Richard Burr to say America shouldn't exist purely as a Kremlin satellite in this age of President Russian Asset?

Then a reporter asked Burr if he's interested in getting his hands on the interpreter's notes from Trump's secret tête-à-têtes with Vladimir Putin, the notes Trump has literally confiscated and hidden from his aides, now that we are more sure than ever that President Russian Asset is a literal actual total fucking Russian intelligence asset.

NAH! And Burr's reasoning is adorably stupid:

O RLY? Would you claim "executive privilege," Richard Burr? Did we miss the part where Putin is actually on the White House payroll now? Because you kind of need that to happen before Trump's conversations with Putin can be called "executive privilege." Did Putin take one of the jobs Mick Mulvaney doesn't have time to do? Is he getting a W-2? Is he making the same salary as Sarah Huckabee Sanders, or did she pull rank and say Putin is brand new and he smells, and she's walking out this fucking door if Putin gets paid the same as she does?


Needless to say, conversations between Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin are not covered by executive privilege.

We know Republicans are goddamned morons, but they don't have to be complete fucking buffoons like Rudy Giuliani on questions like "Executive Privilege: What Even Is It?" Or maybe they do.

The point of this post is that Richard Burr needs to come to Jesus, and also we wanted to do a stupid headline asking whether or not Putin is getting paid during the government shutdown.

And now, having said those things, it is time for your OPEN THREAD.

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Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

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