Wait, So Barack Obama Is Not Really A Mythical Blood-Sucking Horror Monster?

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'I thank you for those items that you sent me, the monkey and the plywood violin ....'In our first 2009 edition of "Email of the Day," we bring you two (2) tragic examples of America's Dumb People fighting a losing battle with words ... and one of them also tries (and fails) to deploy the weapon of "sarcasm." Also: What kind of terrible person refuses to show the Proper Respect to any endeavor loosely connected to some random former Marine?


In apparent response to Intern Juli's link list mentioning a Ben Smith item about some blood-bank group using an Obama logo, we got this tortured string of jabbering nonsense:

From: Tricia

Date: Mon, Jan 12, 2009 sat 7:10 AM

Subject: Vampiric? Hardly

To: tips@wonkette.com

Hello Wonkette,

And I thought you were a wonk. This O Positive Program is a very juicy story, but not in the way you portray! As the the mother of a Marine Sergeant and the founder of the group that Ben Smith linked to last week, I wonder at your writing that vampiric Barack Obama Wants the Blood of Christian Children. Barack isn't getting the blood personally, geez!

Sarcasm aside, where are your priorities?

There is a severe shortage of blood in the Philadelphia area. Probably because of the blood spilled on the streets every weekend as described by surgeon and fallen soldier John Pryor in the WaPo article The War in West Philadelphia

Sarcasm aside, where are your priorities?

All we are trying to do is help our suffering people get the life blood they need when in the hospitals. There are millions of Barack Obama supporters out here willing to take up the call to service and help our fellow citizens

Patricia M.M. S____

Ugh.

And now, the one and only fan of hilarious new right-wing nut site "Big Hollywood" would like to have a few words with us, because it is very rude to criticize some infantile wingnut talking points posted on a website, especially if a Former Marine is to blame for typing something so unbearably shitty that it made us all want to eat a sack of poison meat clumps, for relief.

From: maria louisa h___

To: tips@wonkette.com

Date: Mon, Jan 12, 2009 at 7:04 AM

Subject: Big Hollywood Article.

Hello Wonkette,

Congratulations, I beleive that it only took until the fourth paragraph for you to use the word "douchebag". I guess that you would know one. Nice article also, slandering a former Marine. This blogging thing must really take some balls, woops, I think your herbal tea is ready, don't let it steep too long...you douchebag. Oh and yes, Gary Graham and several present and former Marines are close, personal, friends of mine.

Philip Maurice H____

What the fuck does this even mean? Nothing, as usual. Just more sad evidence of the drooling fail clowns who make America the dumbest country on Earth.

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