WaPo Tries To BUT-HER-EMAILS Elizabeth Warren
On the one hand, things really are getting better. The Post is getting rightly dragged for breathlessly reporting that Senator Elizabeth Warren got paid in actual American currency for practicing law. The blatant sexism in the coverage has overtaken the nothingburger story itself. And Andrew Kaczynski's ratio is a thing of beauty.
On the other hand, WHAT IS THIS SHIT?
Warren's presidential campaign released a list of 56 cases on her website on Wednesday night, revealing a far higher number of cases than Warren (D-Mass.) had previously disclosed and lending detail to an aspect of her career that she rarely discusses in public.
When she first ran for the Senate in 2012, Warren came under pressure from her Republican opponent and the news media to discuss her legal work. At the time, she released a list of just 13 cases without saying whether it represented a full accounting; at least one other case came to light during the race.
LOL, remember that hilarious time when the media pretended that Hillary Clinton had "defended an accused child rapist and laughed about his lenient sentence," because 40 years prior she had been ordered by the court to represent a criminal defendant, and she actually did her job? Remember when they spent months reporting that she had given speeches to Goldman Sachs for money!!!! -- while ignoring the part about Donald Trump getting paid $150,000 by a Ukrainian oligarch to Skype in for a 15-minute talk, and then routing the cash through his charitable foundation where it would be conveniently un-taxed?
The Post is similarly shocked, SHOCKED that an expert witness would charge as much as $675 an hour for her time. How dare Elizabeth Warren get paid fair market value for her labor! If she had minutes in the day left over after being a law professor at University of Pennsylvania and Harvard, she should have spent them organizing the office Christmas party, or having tearful heart-to-hearts with her female students about how you really can have it all, or writing letters of recommendation for their male peers. You know, the uncompensated shit that women do just because they have always done it.
The woman is running for president against a man who routinely stiffed his creditors, who ran a scam "university," and whose main "achomlishment" is managing to go bankrupt running a casino -- a giant machine that takes in quarters and gives back nickels. And we are being subjected to WHAT IS SHE HIDING???? articles because Elizabeth Warren discloses an amicus brief from 2003 where she tried to get creditors paid?
Official Committee of Unsecured Creditors, Cybergenics Corp. v. Chinery, 330 F.3d 548 (3rd Cir. 2003). In this case, Elizabeth argued in an amicus brief that the former owner and parent company of Cybergenics, a bankrupt company, should not be able to keep earnings that they allegedly received fraudulently. Instead, Elizabeth argued that money should go to increasing the compensation available to the company's creditors, ensuring that creditors were treated fairly in the bankruptcy process. The Third Circuit ruled in favor of Elizabeth's position.
AYFKMRN with this BUT HER EMAILS shit?
We see you coming, assholes. We saw it last month with all those How Is Bernie Even Getting Paid to Write a Book if He Says Billionaires Don't Deserve a Tax Cut? stories. As if Elizabeth Warren getting $425,000 over a period of years is exactly the same as the Trump kids getting a billion dollar windfall if we abolish the estate tax. How can you say you really oppose homelessness if you live in a house? If she really supported ending the plight of the poor, she'd get rid of the pantsuit and wear a barrel held up by suspenders!
Spoiler Alert: Lady Writers can write sexist hitpieces, too!
The House Intel Committee published testimony from Michael Cohen this week alleging what Forbes has long suspected -- that Vince and Linda McMahon's $4 million "charitable donation" to Trump's foundation in 2007 was actually his appearance fee for the WWE "Battle of the Billionaires." This allowed the McMahons to take the tax writeoff, and Trump to avoid paying income tax on the money he used for multiple, illegal purposes. Donald Trump is waging several legal battles to hide his taxes and finances from the American voters. But please, tell us more about Elizabeth Warren's scandalous hourly compensation for hard-earned expertise, which she voluntarily disclosed on her own campaign website.
Ending it with the time she was on opposite sides of a fight with AFL-CIO chief Richard Trumka is a really nice touch. Slow clap, WaPo, for mentioning that Trumka endorsed Warren for Senate in 2012.
SLOW FUCKING CLAP.
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Liz Dye lives in Baltimore with her wonderful husband and a houseful of teenagers. When she isn't being mad about a thing on the internet, she's hiding in plain sight in the carpool line. She's the one wearing yoga pants glaring at her phone.