We Sure Do Hope Rod Rosenstein Knows What The Fuck He's Doing Right Now

The constitutional crisis Donald Trump is trying to force is coming along quite nicely!

President Halfwit issued an official proclamation (on Twitter) Sunday wherein he HEREBY DEMANDED the Department of Justice open an investigation into whether DOJ acted properly when it decided to investigate the Trump campaign for being a literal tool of the Russian government (like it sure seems to be!), going so far as to send an informant, Stefan Halper, to "brush up" against some of the most Russian-compromised fuckers on the campaign. In response, Deputy Attorney General Rod Rosenstein was like "sure bro, whatever you say," and punted it over to the DOJ's inspector general. Was the request from Trump obscene? Of course! Is he abusing his power? You betcha! Should he be impeached for it? Nixon went down for FAR LESS, when you consider all the ways Trump has abused his power in 15 short and pathetic months in office.

At the same time, Rosenstein has been adamant that his DOJ will not be "extorted," either by Trump or by talking lobotomies in Congress like Devin Nunes and Mark Meadows, who have been demanding to see highly classified information about the FBI's investigation into the Trump campaign, likely so they can use it to obstruct justice, and also so they can leak it to the White House so Trump can openly interfere some more. Rosenstein has made this clear even as he has noted that he and his family have been on the receiving end of threats, because in Donald Trump's and Devin Nunes's America, we do shit KREMLIN-STYLE.

On Monday afternoon, Rosenstein and FBI Director Chris Wray were forced to endure a White House meeting with President Shitmouth, and also DNI Dan Coats, and news reports suggest they bought some time before the inevitable Saturday Night Massacre, by agreeing to show some stuff to Congress:

[Sarah Huckabee] Sanders said in a statement after the Monday meeting: “Based on the meeting with the President, the Department of Justice has asked the Inspector General to expand its current investigation to include any irregularities with the Federal Bureau of Investigation’s or the Department of Justice’s tactics concerning the Trump Campaign.”

Right, basically what Rosenstein had already said. But then there was also this:

She added, “It was also agreed that White House Chief of Staff [John] Kelly will immediately set up a meeting with the FBI, DOJ, and DNI together with Congressional Leaders to review highly classified and other information they have requested.”

What? The fuck? Does John Kelly have to do with this? And why would DOJ agree to show him stuff, so he can show it to Trump? Or is it just that Rod Rosenstein and Chris Wray were like, "Yeah buddy, sure, we'll have another meeting. It'll be fun! We'll bring potato salad and everything, and definitely for sure all the intelligence you want to see" and thus kicked the can down the road a little further?

This could be bad. As evidence of that, simply note that Mark Meadows, head of the House Freedom Caucus, is very pleased with the outcome of this meeting. Also, as WaPo notes, Rudy Giuliani went ahead and said the quiet part loud this weekend -- again -- about how the Trump legal team can't wait to see all of DOJ's intel on the investigation INTO TRUMP so they can obstruct justice FOR TRUMP.

Adam Schiff, ranking member on the dysfunctional House Intel Committee, is not pleased:

“Rudy Giuliani made it clear today that he wants these documents for the Trump legal defense team. That is not appropriate, and I have a concern about anyone from the White House being present for review of these sensitive documents, because the White House should have no role in access to these investigative materials.”

Ya think?

Also, it is a well-known fact that if Devin Nunes gets his hands on sensitive shit, he will immediately leak it to Fox News, even if it endangers American lives. That's how patriotic he is.

On the other hand, Wonkette pal Charlie Pierce thinks Rosenstein is a shrewd operator who is making the best of a really bad (completely awful, as in, will do damage to the Department of Justice and the rule of law in general for years to come) situation. Pierce is cautiously optimistic, as is Wonkette, that Rosenstein knows what the fuck he is doing, and that, even more than that, he just might be playing Trump like a fiddle. Of course, we are actively CHOOSING cautious optimism, because the alternative -- that he's fighting a rear guard action to desperately save our institutions from being Trumped to death -- is too alarming and depressing and we really don't want our doctor to have to up our blood pressure meds.

Oh hey, speaking of blood pressure, did you hear that Chuck Grassley, the world's stupidest senator and the chair of the Senate Judiciary Committee, is demanding to be looped in on this, and also is demanding to see all the sexts between British dossier spy Christopher Steele and this one guy Bruce Ohr, who used to be associate deputy attorney general, because Ohr's wife worked at Fusion GPS, which means this is all part of the DEEP STATE CONSPIRACY to frame Trump? Christ, what a dumbass Chuck Grassley is.

Anyway, everything is terrible and we would like to drink alcohol now, but maybe Rod Rosenstein and Chris Wray have this shit under control. We sure do goddamn hope so.

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[Washington Post]

Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.


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