We Won't Have Jeb Bush Or His Exclamation Point To Kick Around Anymore

One last time (who are we kidding?)

We'll have your full Nevada/South Carolina wrap up for you bright and early Sunday morning, but there are some things you gotta get on right away. Or at least, just as soon as you've finished your soup. Jeb Bush's presidential campaign is over. It is no more. It has rung down the curtain and joined the Choir Celestial. This is an ex-candidate.

After coming in fourth in the South Carolina primary, Jeb finally let the suffering end. Or as former Jeopardy! Champ Ken Jennings put it:

All that money, all that sense of entitlement, all that "destiny" crap -- it wasn't enough to overcome all that ineffable Bushness. The word salad, the reminders of how much America loved his idiot brother (who ended up looking like "the smart one" after all), the struggling with zippers, the "please clap," -- really, did anyone think he still had a chance after that?

[contextly_sidebar id="GMD2r4UesfudmEmMMmQ36oZjCmV4isVk"]And now Jeb can go home and let his mom beat him some more, and he'll like it.

At least Marco Rubio had some nice things to say about him.

Bye, Jeb! Bye! We're looking forward to Monday's Rachel Maddow show, where she *poofs!* you from what used to be the big wall of candidates.

Mr. Bush is expected to be sent to a nice farm upstate where he can run and play with other former presidential candidates. And now, Ben Carson can look forward to surging into fifth place in future primaries, maybe.


Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.


How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)


©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc