Weekly Top Ten

Wonkette's Top 10 Is Bottomlessly Assh*lish!

NO IT ISN'T YOU SHUT UP.

Good morning, bienvenue, wallcome to your Saturday morning Wonkette's Top 10! We are up early and hurrying through Top 10 because TODAY we are driving the 50 miles to TOWN to go to a GARAGE SALE! Is it not the most exciting thing you have heard yet this morning? It is for the girls! I am in the market for colored glass jars. Did you know I used to be a nightlife columnist, with bars and concerts and rock stars and clubs and restaurants and my tits on a plate? (That is what we called my pushup bra. It was magenta.) Anyway, colored glass jars, maybe another set of canisters for flour and ... barley? Sure, barley. Fucking middle age, dude. Ha ... ha?

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Weekly Top Ten

Wonkette's Weekly Top 10 Is Washing Its Hair!

You come read your top 10 stories right now!

Good morning and happy Holy Saturday to you! What are you all doing for Holy Saturday? Something with cats? No shit. Okay, enough chit chat, time for Top 10!

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Weekly Top Ten

Wonkette's Top 10 Is Fine You Guys I Am Sorry I Worried You!

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Good morning! Bienvenue! Wahlcome! Today's Wonkette Top 10 was chosen by a cry of actors!

Hurry, there's no time to waste!

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Weekly Top Ten

Wonkette's Top 10 Is ... Is It 'Happy'?

You come read your top 10 stories right now!

Semiregular check-in: HOW ARE YOU DOING. ARE YOU OKAY. DID JOE BIDEN PERSONALLY COME VAX YOU YET? Yesterday Joe Biden came and personally vaxxed the last remaining adult in our home, or rather sent enough doses to the rez where we live that our (Republican) neighbor whose wife works for the tribe knocked on our door to see if anyone needed vaxxing: Vials had been opened, and somebody best use them!

Guys, this is so fucking huge. I mean, it's huge for us, though we still have two little girls in the house and can't go out licking your faces just yet. But Biden's announcement Wednesday was huge for everybody. All adults eligible by May (and I'm guessing that's really vaxxed by May, since Prezzy Joe likes to underpromise/overdeliver) is huge. We were looking at July — late July! — before, and the thought of that even for middle aged people who already worked at home and whose wonderful grown kids came home ... was fucking sickening. It's coming you guys. It's truly coming. OK, top 10 as chosen this week by an apron of nurses.

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