A portly neckbearded gentleman with a pink shirt and a blowtorch sets fire to a box of Honey Nut Cheerios to show General Mills that he does not care for its gay-friendly policies. It does not go quite as brilliantly as he planned, thanks to wind and highly flammable sugar. But what else has been set on fire lately? Well, what hasn't?

We are going to assume that the mosque that was burned to the ground in Joplin, Missouri, this morning was also just a fun protest prank gone awry, and not at all deliberate arson as was ruled on the mosque's previous fire, just five weeks ago. Because everybody knows terrorists only come in Muslim-flavored, which is why Michelle Malkin et al. lost their shit when the Department of Homeland Security put out its report on homegrown terror doods.

We would like to recommend that Christian lulzmongers seek a source of inspiration other than 4chan. "KILL IT WITH FIRE" is not going to win them any friends.


Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.


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