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Donald Trump doesn't give a damn about Bob Woodward's BAD BOOK, Fear. He's not freaking out that the reporter who took down Nixon got 420 pages of Trumpland staffers saying, "You didn't hear it from me, but that guy's a fucking idiot!" That's why he tweeted about it eleven times in the past 24 hours -- at this point, he's just referring to it as "book."

The White House is definitely not panicking, which is why they produced this very credible statement from Defense Secretary Mattis, who has the highest appreciation for the president's sophisticated understanding of invisible airplanes and things that fall down go BOOM.


How could anyone think that this snark about "fiction" came from White House Mean Girl Sarah Huckabee Sanders? Obviously, Secretary Mattis wrote the entire thing longhand, with a quill pen.

Also, too, Chief of Staff John Kelly knows the president is NOT AN IDIOT. So simmer down, haters!

Thank goodness for the REAL NEWS guys at the Daily Caller, who know their job is not to ask questions when Trump slags Bob Woodward's credibility.

It's just another bad book. He's had a lot of credibility problems. ... I probably would have preferred to speak to him, but maybe not. I think it probably wouldn't have made a difference in the book. He wanted to write the book a certain way.

If Donald Trump says that Bob Woodward never asked to interview him, then it never happened. Truth isn't truth, and tapes aren't tapes. Which is a good thing, since Woodward has literally hundreds of hours of them recorded while he was interviewing people for his "bad book."

Many people are saying Trump should sue!

Yeah, why won't those Washington politicians change state tort laws to allow the president to file a libel suit? SAD.

If it weren't for Democrat obstruction, Trump would definitely sue Bob Woodward for saying that Trump called Attorney General Jeff Sessions "retarded."

This guy is mentally retarded. He's this dumb Southerner. … He couldn't even be a one-person country lawyer down in Alabama.

Donald Trump never uses slurs!

Oh, hahaha! Well, Trump really does love the GREAT south. That part is totally true, probably.

Because Bob Woodward is just a con! A Democrat operative! Look at the timing!

Who you gonna believe? Donald Trump, or a guy with two Pulitzers and hundreds of hours of tapes?

Whatever! Executive Time's over now. Whatever you do, don't buy "book!"

Follow your FDF on Twitter!

This week is nuts! You should fund us, for reals.

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[WaPo / Daily Caller]

Five Dollar Feminist

Your FDF lives in Baltimore under an assumed identity as an upstanding member of the PTA. Shhh, don't tell anyone she makes swears on the internet!

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CLEAR YOUR CALENDARS FOR FEBRUARY 7! And then fill them back up with whatever the fuck you want, because Michael Cohen has announced through his lawyers that he is too scared to testify before an open session of Congress that day, citing threats to his family from Donald Trump and Rudy Giuliani.

Wonkette has no reason to believe Cohen isn't being serious here, and NBC News reports Cohen's wife and father-in-law are particularly concerned about their safety if the man who used to call his boss MIS-TURRRR TWUMP goes to Congress and tells the truth this time. Still, we must pause to note that this is the same guy who said this to NPR reporter Tim Mak, back when Mak was at The Daily Beast:

"I will make sure that you and I meet one day while we're in the courthouse. And I will take you for every penny you still don't have," Cohen told Mak [...] "And I will come after your Daily Beast and everybody else that you possibly know."

"So I'm warning you, tread very fucking lightly, because what I'm going to do to you is going to be fucking disgusting. You understand me?"

It's not so fun when the shoe is on the other foot, IS IT, MICHAEL?

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Did Nancy Pelosi do something to give Donald Trump the mistaken impression he has leverage here? We don't remember her doing anything like that!

Trump sent Pelosi a letter this morning to say that, despite how she told him to stay the fuck out of her House because of his government shutdown, he would still be coming to the House on January 29 to deliver his State of the Union address. And for some weird-ass reason, Trump and his advisers in the White House actually thought she would back down. It's both hilarious and alarming that Trump and his people are that stupid, isn't it?

Anyway, Pelosi took the dare. She took the dare. Was there anybody besides those dumb fucking idiots in the White House who thought she wouldn't take the dare?

Pelosi sent a letter right back to Trump to kindly explain to him that no means "go fuck yourself," and that if he'd like her to stick her foot further up his ass and kick it around a bunch, he's welcome to test her some more:

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