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Teevee's absolute worst offense against humankind "Dancing With the Stars" is now also teevee's worst offense against that other section of beings "the teabaggers,"  because one of the illiterate trolls in Andrew Breitbart's stable of typing tumors at BigHollywood.com just, uh, happened to notice some costume designer dude on the show picking up a gorilla mask once worn by ol' whatshername the grifter-quitter grandma's annoying famewhore daughter and saying, "It still smells like a Tea Party!" NOT COOL, BOLSHIE! This Breitbart slaveblogger, one "Warner Todd Huston," will THROW DOWN in the teabagger defense with an Important Discussion about socialism and body odor, after the jump!

Here is WTH's most important question for readers:

So, what are we to make of this nonsense?

Is Kressley saying that Tea Party activists smell like gorillas?

Yes, what are we to make of this nonsense? Perhaps take a lighthearted ribbing in stride? NO, WE MUST MAKE SERIOUS-MINDED SENSE OF EVERYTHING ON TEEVEE. That is the point of television, ever since it was invented by Teddy Roosevelt, one of our Founding Fathers. We learned this on teevee!

Are we supposed to be laughing at that, now?

So, what do Democrats smell like? Maybe Europeans? How about reds?

Yes, that depends, though, what, do Europeans smell like? Do, they smell bad? We, aren't really sure, we heard they smell, like gay French brie. Reds, on the other hand, smell, like Stalin's corpse, on a humid day. Which, is worse? That, is the question.

I wonder what dance partner Anna Trebunskaya, who was born in Russia, thinks about that? I wonder how ABC will take attacking so much of its audience?

Whatever Anna or ABC thinks of it the bigger questions is, what do you Tea Partiers think?

Dammit, there is so little English grammar in that last sentence that we cannot make out the entire point of his post. Which is sad, for comedy, BECAUSE WE ARE SURE THERE WAS ONE. [YouTube/ BigHollywood]

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While the year 2018 will be remembered for a lot of (mostly terrible) things, it should also go down in history as the year two entirely different women got married to ghosts. Most recently, a lady named Amethyst Realm (of course) made headlines by claiming that after having had sex with at least 20 different ghosts, she had finally settled down with one she met on a flight to Australia. As one does.

But before Amethyst Realm, there was Amanda Teague, a former Jack Sparrow impersonator who was very obsessed with Disney's Pirates of the Caribbean, and who in January announced that she had married the ghost of a 300 year-old pirate named Jack Teague. Teague claimed that Jack Teague had been a black Haitian pirate who at one point had been left at the altar, and had been executed for high treason. She also claimed that they had sex -- including a little pregnancy scare -- and that he once bought her a coffee maker.

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Time for another episode of Poppy's Bad Tweets, wherein we answer the eternal question, DOES COMMANDER TWITTER THUMBS HAVE A POINT, OR IS HE JUST SMOCKING CRACK?

(Spoiler alert ....)

Yeah, About That NO COLLUSION...

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