Wonkagenda: September 16, 2016

Morning Wonkers! It's Friday! Here's some of the things yr Wonkette may make dick jokes about today!

•  Donald Trump's campaign swears Trump is not a birther despite Trump himself not being able talk about it. Good thing he spent years talking about Obama's birth certificate.

•  Trump released his NEW new tax plan, which is just about as bad as his old new tax plan (unless you're super rich), and is unsustainable.

• The energy plan released by Trump seems to benefit Carl Icahn, who coincidentally donates many monies to Donald Trump.

• Kansas Secretary of State Kris Kobach wants you to show a birth certificate before you vote to make sure you're not an election-rigging terrorist .

•  Mark Begich might make a run for his old Senate seat in Alaska after all, as a write-in candidate.

•  Reporters were stuck on a plane during a Trump rally in New Hampshire, so Trump decided to talk shit about reporters. 

• Is Donald Trump considering opportunist and genuine scumbag Peter Thiel for the Supreme Court? Trump's campaign denies it, and a Thiel spokesman said HuffPo's source was lying and Thiel doesn't even want the dumb job.

•  Milo Yianno-whatsit thinks people will remember him being a shit heel because he says more idiotic things than Trump.

• A federal appeals court isn't sure if it's cool to allow former psychiatric patients to own guns. ( ARCHIVE )

•  Democrats went back to the floor of the House and held up pictures of the victims of gun violence since that's about as close as we're going to get to debate on gun control.

•  Dr. Oz edited out another joke where Donald Trump talked about banging his own daughter.

• And here's your morning Nice Time! It's kitties!