chris christie convention john kasich Kate McKinnon laura ingraham mike pence NATO nazi newt gingrich pt: news breifing Q-Arena rnc ted cruz trump Trump Jr. veep weekend update
Wonkagenda: Thursday, 7/21/2016
- Ted Cruz shit the bed last night when he spoke at the Republican National Convention and didn't endorse Trump. SPOILER ALERT: Everybody.Hates.Ted Cruz.
- Donald Trump gave an interview to the New York Times where he said he'd only help NATO allies if they "have fulfilled their obligations to us," literally contradicting his Veep.
- Mike Pence accepted the nomination to be Trump's Veep. His speech was "meh".
- Melania Trump's PLAGIARISM was finally acknowledged by the Trump camp in a half-assed explanation that just makes us want to talk about their stupidity even more.
- In an effort to try and stay relevant, Newt Gingrich did a talky thing last night because he's Newt Fucking Gingrich, and he'll do anything for love.
- According to the newz people, Donald Trump Jr. called John Kasich and asked him to be Trump's Veep with benefits because Donald Trump is a lazy dickhole.
- The Koch Brothers have stopped giving an allowance to Senator Ron Johnson.
- Squawking bird-lady Laura Ingraham, said some stupid, shrill words, and then "ACCIDENTALLY" gave a Nazi salute.
- Cleveland's Q. Arena has been fraught with technical malfunctions that seem like obvious metaphors for how much of a poorly managed shit-show the entire Republican National Convention has been. PATHETIC.
- Hillary Clinton is the star of the Republican convention. What, you expected solid policy proposals?
- The guy who REALLY wrote the "Art of the Deal" has received a cease-and-desist letter that demands a return of royalties after he exposed Trump for being a crazy dickhead.
- SNL did a special nicetime Weekend Update thingy, with Kate McKinnon as notorious RBG! (This intern is smitten!)