It's all cheap asses and skinflints in today's Wonk'd with Clarence Thomas splurging on sesame chicken for his clerks, John Ashcroft trying to get to The Front Page before the free taco happy hour ends, and David Gregory hassling the hardest working independent booksellers in America. These succulent morsels plus what Mark Warner is still running for, and a GILF you've forgotten was still alive.

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* Was at lunch with a few co-workers today [11/30] at Young Chow's on Penn. Ave. (on the Hill) and the hostess sat us next to Justice Clarence Thomas and his 4 gawky looking white guy companions (presumably clerks, but they looked like they were 16). He seemed to keep up animated conversation the whole time we were there, and was startlingly polite in thanking the waitress when they left. However, if treating his clerks to lunch is a rare occurrence (if that was what he was doing), I would think that on his Supreme Court Justice salary he could have done a little better than the place we affectionately call "Cheap Chinese."

* Saw former Virginia governor and former presidential hopeful Mark Warner Thursday [11/23] morning braving the rain with his daughter to participate in the Alexandria Turkey Trot. [He finished middle of the pack.]

* Saw David Gregory yesterday (Sunday 11/26, 2pm) at Politics and Prose in NW. He is enormously tall! He was at the counter thanking the clerk for notifying him his book had arrived, but the funny thing was he seemed mildly annoyed that they called his cell phone when it was the middle of the night in Asia, where he was traveling with President Bush. Also, he kinda has acne scars up close.

* Let the eagles waddle: saw John Ashcroft this morning [11/30] entering the lobby of a law firm next to Buffalo Billiards in Dupont. He hesitated before entering the revolving door and refused to make eye contact with me (I was hoping he'd break out into song) and proceeded to the elevators with a grimace/grin/guffaw - maybe he had gas.

* Saw Joan Collins, looking expectedly well preserved, at the Filene's Basement on F Street this afternoon, with her forty-ish man toy in tow (he was yapping on a cell phone about how DC was going well, then blah blah something about the Kennedy Center). She was looking at luggage and then informed a saleswoman that she needed "a cheap suitcase for shipping, that's going to be thrown away once it reaches its destination."