Wonkette's Top Ten Stories Of The Week Got Some Positive Moves For You
Boy do I ever have a great present for all of you this morning! Definitely a great way to start your day and your weekend. It is an Angela Lansbury workout video called "Positive Moves," and you are welcome.
ANGELA LANSBURY'S POSITIVE MOVES - 1988 VHSwww.youtube.com
I love her so much, you don't even know. People say she was a serial killer who actually murdered all of Cabot Cove, but I contend that she was actually only very rarely even in Cabot Cove and was in fact usually traveling around the country on book tours or visiting her 85,000 nieces and nephews, murdering people in other places as well.
Fun fact, Jessica Fletcher was briefly a guest lecturer at famed murder institution Hudson University. You know, where all the hip young people on Law and Order franchises die.
Anyway, here are your top ten stories of the week!
10. 100 Year Old Lady At Florida School Board Better Patriot Than All Book Banners Put Together
9. Trump Sends Former Michael Cohen Lawyer To Manhattan Grand Jury To Talk Smack About ... Michael Cohen
8. Surely Trump Wants His Followers To 'TAKE OUR NATION BACK' In A Peaceful, Zip-Tie-Free Way
7. Why The Right Can't Define 'Woke'
6. Ron DeSantis Troubled By TRUMP PEENER PORN STAR HUSH MONEY LOL Witch Hunt, So Very Troubled
5. Ron DeSantis Clarifies That Putin Is Bad, Please Put In The Newspaper That He Said Bad
4. Republican Congressman Mad At Fraudulent Nut Milk
3. Is Your Moisturizer Making Daily Wire Hosts Want To Kill People In Front Of You?
2. What's Worse Than A Pile Of Dead Babies And Why Is It Sarah Huckabee Sanders’s Anti-Abortion Monument?
1. Trump's Current Elite Strike Force Of Lawyers Very Elite, Super Strikey
Did reading these stories give you a sudden urge to shower us with money and jewels? If so, you can join our Patreon, or buy our merch, or do your Amazon shopping through our link.
You can even send us paper checks to
PO Box 38273
Detroit MI 48238
OR use this handy widget below! Just click the amount you want to donate, click one-time or monthly, and then be sure to click "Paypal" if you are Paypal or "Stripe" if you don't have Paypal, or your money will not go through!
Robyn Pennacchia is a brilliant, fabulously talented and visually stunning angel of a human being, who shrugged off what she is pretty sure would have been a Tony Award-winning career in musical theater in order to write about stuff on the internet. Follow her on Twitter at @RobynElyse